We’re venturing into new territory here- but then again, quarantine has forced us to do things that I’m sure none of us expected to do.

This is my first television list on this blog (if you don’t count the Black Mirror list I did a while back)- at least the first one that addresses multiple shows in one article.

As I’m sure all of us experienced, we were kept inside a lot this year. And so, what better way to entertain ourselves than by watching television all day. And for the first time, I watched enough TV this year that I finally have enough entries to put a list together!

These are the 10 best series of television (that I watched) from 2020. Entries need to have premiered this year, and presented as a season. So anything that has a 2020 release date, you’re in the running.

As a bonus, I also have included some TV shows that did not premiere this year, but I finally got around to finishing this year. Just so you can laugh at me for missing out on these shows the first time around.

Now, I’m not gonna lie, you’re probably going to see a lot of Netflix on this list. It’s the one streaming service I have access to that is fully funded by me, and I’m too afraid to ask the people who own the Hulu, Prime, and HBO Max accounts if I can watch a series on those sites. That, and Netflix is just better when it comes to TV, in my opinion. Those other sites might have one or two good shows, but there are PLENTY on Netflix.

By the way, MAJOR spoilers ahead, if you haven't seen any of these yet.

Here's some stuff I watched that didn't come out this year, but I certainly enjoyed myself watching this ​year:
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I have to admit, I enjoyed The People vs. OJ Simpson better than I enjoyed The Assassination of Gianni Versace. But that is not to say that the miniseries (another Ryan Murphy creation) is bad. Darren Criss’ role as Andrew Cunanan is a masterful portrayal of a man with nothing left to lose. It’s a sad, sad story. 

Episode highlights include “A Random Killing,” where Cunanan encounters Lee Miglin, and we get an excellent performance from his wife, played by Judith Light; “House by the Lake,” where a prolonged road trip yields devastating results, and “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell,” where we get two very different coming out stories. By the end, whether they like it or not, Versace and Cunanan are inextricably linked.
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How did I NOT know about this show prior to this year? I loved it so much, I even went as Wirt for Halloween. Cartoon Network’s 2015 miniseries follows Wirt (Elijah Wood) and Greg (Collin Dean) in their quest to get home. Along they way, they travel through a vast forest, encountering many odd creatures along the way, including a woodsman (voiced by Christopher Lloyd) and Beatrice, a bluebird (Melanie Lynskey) who helps them to find a woman called Adelaide who can help the boys find their way home.

Speaking of a show whose episodes are 10 minutes long (and also an animated series), look no further than Infinity Train. I saw the pilot episode for this show back in 2017, and when I went back to look it up out of curiosity this year, the show had put out two seasons, with a third premiering this year on HBO Max. 

Picture a girl on a train. Why is she there? Where is the train going and why is it so long? And why does she have this glowing green number on her hand? Infinity Train is an excellent mini-mystery series at the outset, but it also addresses issues in a way that is accessible to children. Main character Tulip (Ashley Johnson) wrestles with the effects of her parents’ divorce as she tries to figure out a way to get off the train. While on the train, she encounters a number of challenges which force her to think of ways to solve the puzzle, often forcing her to think introspectively.

Book 2 two revealed that the show was an anthology series, picking up the character of Mirror Tulip (a mirror version of Tulip introduced in an episode of season one also voiced by Johnson), and her adventures aboard the train. She meets Jesse (Robbie Draymond), a boy from the real world who’s been brought onto the train to endure the same trials Tulip did. MT grapples with wanting to leave the train with Jesse, but since she is a denizen of the train, it may be impossible for her to leave. 

I love a good anthology series where all the parts and characters connect to each other, especially if it’s a larger “why am I here/what is this place?” narrative. Similarly, when a children’s cartoon introduces subjects about personal growth, it’s always a win. I haven’t gotten around to it yet, but I’m very excited to see what season three holds.
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What can I say? Community is one the best shows of all time. Quick-witted. Meta. Absurd. Heartfelt. And believe it or not, though I’d seen the ending before, I found there were gaps in my viewing, so I’m counting this as finishing a full season of television in 2020. 

Plus, it gives me a chance to talk about the show. 

First, the cast. Joel McHale. Gillian Jacobs. Allison Brie. Danny Pudi. Donald Glover. Yvette Nicole Brown. Chevy Chase. Ken Jeong. Jim Rash. And even though half of them were gone by the end (namely Glover, Chase, and Brown), the show made it work. Maybe not in season four once Dan Harmon left, but definitely in seasons five and six, as cast members like Paget Brewster, Jonathan Banks, John Oliver and Keith David filled in nicely and served their purposes by the end of the show.

Some favorites episodes of mine:

• The Paintball Episodes (Modern Warfare, A Fistful of Paintballs, A Few Paintballs More, Modern Espionage)- References to war films, westerns, and Star Wars. Plus, an element of combat and some of the best storytelling in the series. What’s not to love?
• “Epidemiology”- Zombie movie + LOTS and LOTS of ABBA music.
• “Cooperative Polygraphy”- What starts as a polygraph test of the study group to allow Pierce to get his last words in ends up taking JUST A FEW twists and turns that has a fulfilling, if not bittersweet, ending. Plus, Walton Goggins!
• “Remedial Chaos Theory”- One of the more meta episodes of the series. Can rolling a die actually create alternate dimensions? Oh well. Something for your brain to chew on. I wonder how those other timelines are doing.

And now, a look at the best TV I consumed this year.
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Space Force is an interesting show- and though it’s been renewed for season two, I’m not entirely sure what the future holds. For one thing, we’re going to have a new President come January, and I’m not entirely sure how the dynamic will change in regards to the shadow of the Trump-like POTUS that oversees the action of (in this case, the semi-fictional world of) Space Force, a department that he created. So will the show address this? At this point, we’re not sure.

For another, the show has its moments of both humor and poignancy, and we’ve been left with a lot of questions that need answering. How did Maggie Naird (Lisa Kudrow) end up in prison? What will Gen. Mark Naird’s (Steve Carell) do in response to the Chinese astronauts trashing the American astronauts’ moon base? And, in an interesting twist I did not anticipate caring about, what will be the status of the relationship between Angela (Tawny Newsome) and Chan (Jimmy O. Yang)? And will we see more parodies of currently congresspeople, namely Representative Pitosi, Senator Schugler, and Anabela Ysidro-Campos (plays on Nancy Pelosi, Chuck Schumer, and AOC, respectively)?

Speaking of parodies of government people- Ben Schwartz’s character, F. Tony Scarapiducci, is a play on Anthony Scaramucci (Trump’s Director of Communication for all of 12 days). He is referred to (even by himself) throughout the series as “Fuck Tony”. So there’s that little nugget for ya.

Questions aside, the series isn’t terrible, and the actors do a fine job for some of the material they’ve been given. The dialogue (which I think could be construed as boring otherwise) is elevated by the performances of the likes of Carell and John Malkovich, the latter of the two is the SOLE reason you should watch the show. 

Malkovich’s character, Dr. Adrian Mallory, is the only competent person working in Space Force. That much is clear from the outset. Mallory takes orders from no one, least of all Naird, and plays by his own ambiguous rules, but always acting for the good in the name of science, exploration, and, I’m sure on a deeper level, the people. But both his eloquence and his outbursts are quintessentially Malkovich-ian, seen mostly in the various ways he destroys the idiots around him trying to tell him what to do, ranging from Sorkin-levels of monologuing to Scorsese-levels of cursing, all of which are enough to rival an enigmatic figure like Nicolas Cage. It’s all there, and it’s all brilliant.

Overall, I think Space Force leaves a lot to be desired, but, like space, we still have much to explore. And I hope it only gets more exciting from here.
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This one came in the early days of quarantine, when no one was sure exactly what to do with themselves. Enter: Tiger King: Murder, Mayhem, and Madness, which took over Netflix when it premiered back in late March. 

Does anyone remember what this show was even about? Or are we all still obsessed with Carole Baskin supposedly feeding her ex-husband to the tigers she keeps at her wildlife rescue preserve? Don’t forget, the real story revolves around Joe Exotic, the eccentric owner of the G.W. Zoo in Wynnewood, Oklahoma, and his feud with Ms. Baskin, which culminates in a murder-for-hire plot that landed Mr. Exotic in prison (where he is currently serving a 22 year sentence). Like, remember all the crazy shit that happens in this series? Remember Doc Antle? The guy who also runs a wildlife sanctuary… that was also some weird personality cult full of women who had to, like, worship the guy? And what about poor Rick Kirkham, who ends up running Joe Exotic TV, only to have Joe (or one of his associates) literally burn all of his footage because Joe found out he wasn’t in control of it? And then Jeff Lowe, a seedy Las Vegas playboy that Joe turns his zoo over to for legal reasons? Pretty sure this is the part where we got the legendary line: “I’m never going to financially recover from this,” wherein one of the tigers attacks a G.W. Zoo employee. And Joe’s three-way same-sex relationship with Travis and John? Oh! And Joe ran for President (of all things) in 2016, and Governor of Oklahoma in 2018- where it’s revealed that a cameraman of his actually became his campaign manager! ALL of this happened in a seven-episode docuseries.

And then there was the whole murder-for-hire thing. Right. And it also goes without mentioning that the series implies that the animals are not treated well, and that it boils down to politics between two humans that only want to ruin each other, without any consideration for the other living beings they have come to be in charge of.

I’m scratching just the tip of the iceberg about Tiger King, but this series is a microcosm of the insanity that is this quarantine. It’s a trip, and with each turn, you don’t know how you ended up where you are, or where or when you started, but you’re here now, and this is reality. Cheers to Tiger King for holding up the mirror to society, in a weird, sleazy, furry kind of way.
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Big Mouth returned for its fourth season better than ever, packed with some cringey, gross-out moments we haven’t seen the likes of since the first season, and picking up where it left off in terms of its powerful statements about growing older and trying to figure yourself out.

The theme of this season is very much “anxiety, fuck yeah!,” where just about every character deals with some sort of stress. First is Nick (Nick Kroll), who fears that he will be replaced by both Seth (Seth Rogen- his camp best friend) and Andrew (John Mulaney- his school best friend), as the latter two hit it off during the summer. Elsewhere, the show deals with identity, particularly with Missy (Jenny Slate, and later, Ayo Edebiri), as she wrestles with embracing her Black identity and “growing up white”- the show is so meta about it that it nods to Missy being voiced by a white actor multiple times throughout the season, until Slate gives way to Edebiri in the penultimate episode, where Missy meets “Mosaic Missy,” with Edebiri permanently becoming  the voice of the character. The focus of the series shifts back to Nick, as we get a glimpse into his future, where he eventually turns into Nick Starr, a successful but pompous and isolated gameshow host, whose entire life has been shaped by Nick pushing away his friends. We get this GREAT narrative of how just because you’re the way you are now, doesn’t mean you can’t change, especially when you’re only in eighth grade.

Jessi (Jessi Klein), in addition to learning more about menstrual cycles and becoming a woman, also deals with the stress of going to a new school and managing her depression- eventually, we meet the Gratitoad (Zach Galifianakis), who teaches Jessi about being grateful for things in her life, and teaches me about who my new favorite character is. Andrew, meanwhile, is his typical cringey self, dealing with issues from constipation to masturbation. Matthew (Andrew Rannells) struggles with coming out to both of his parents, all while Jay (Jason Mantzoukas) and Lola (Kroll) have… the best relationship the series has ever seen? We also get some interesting miniature arcs throughout the season, notably Natalie, a camper who has transitioned at the start of the season, and even Coach Steve, who shares his birthday with a particularly sad day.

Not that Big Mouth was ever bad, but I’m happy it’s done a return-to-form for season 4. I haven’t had to cover my face when a prolonged and gross sequence occurred since the first or second season (the main one I speak of is in episode 3. Let’s call it the “giving birth” sequence for ambiguity purposes), and I… missed that, if that’s not weird to say. Furthermore, I have been so impressed with the show’s ability to reflect the obstacles that teenagers face when growing up. Anxiety, depression, sexuality, identity, and even things like divorce, are all things real kids face. Props to the show for facing the issues head on and making the kids relatable to even adults.
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This season of The Politician spread its wings in the only way a Ryan Murphy sitcom could, by taking, quite literally, the entire country, in its scope. Also, Bette Midler’s in it. This show is a version of Glee where the only difference is that it’s slightly more rooted in reality. But only slightly. Notice how I didn’t say there’s no singing in The Politician.

Moving away from the small-town student leadership role of season 1, season 2 lands us in the middle of New York City, where Payton Hobart (Ben Platt) has just declared his candidacy for New York State Senate, a position held by longtime incumbent, Dede Standish (Judith Light). Meanwhile, his mother, Georgina (Gwyneth Paltrow) is headlong into a campaign to be Governor of California. 

This season of the show really felt like it was starting to become something other than a rich-kid teen drama. The bright colors, lit by the backdrop of a bright, sunny California, are replaced by a colder, steelier atmosphere of New York City. And despite the triviality of some of the feuds between members of Payton’s campaign team, the goal remains the same: get their boy in the room.

What I really enjoyed about this season was the seamless shift of character focus that makes total sense. Out goes Jessica Lange and in comes Bette Midler as Hadassah Gold, Dede’s Chief of Staff. Bette is right at home in the role, and plays the mousy Chief of Staff role to perfection, while also showing us vulnerability after getting caught up in Dede’s three-way-marital affairs… I mean, “throuple.” (This show is one Matthew Morrison or Lea Michele appearance away from being Glee, I swear to you.)

Naturally, as Infinity Jackson (Zoey Deutch) is free from her grandmother’s clutches (remember that whole “playing off of The Act” from Hulu thing from last season), she goes off to pursue her career as a writer and later environmental activist, and naturally we see her less frequently. Of course, Infinity ends up helping Payton once again… before becoming a thorn in his side (see: throwing a ballot box into the East River) once again. 

Even the members of Payton’s inner circle, McAfee (Laura Dreyfuss), James (Theo Germaine), Skye (Rahne Jones), Astrid (Lucy Boynton) and Alice (Julia Schlaepfer) have their moments too. Take, for example, Astrid and Alice fleeing to a hippy farm and supporting each other at a camp for expectant mothers (shoutout my former roommate Lizzy Jutila), or the little “what are YOU doing here” moment that was film at the theatre I used to work at. 

And finally, we get (although the moments are fewer this season, they’re definitely earned) some brief but meaningful moments between Payton and his visions of River, who died at the start of season one.

Overall, the show feels more grown up in season two, and has a more lighthearted take on a grueling political campaign. The Politician shows us the relationship between both younger and older votes (see: “The Voters”), and how even though they may come from different backgrounds and grew up with different rules, they’re not so different when it boils right down to it. I’m not sure if there’s a season three in the works yet (and truthfully, I’d be fine if it didn’t- the ending to season two was a solid enough ending for me), but it will certainly be interesting to see where the show goes from here, should they decide to move up in the world. This is what House of Cards was missing. You have to start small and work your way up an enormous ladder to get all the way to the top. Perhaps Beau Willimon should have thought of putting his characters in a high school class president race first. Oh well. This show is ridiculous. And I absolutely love it.
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And now for something completely different- a series from… Apple TV+? I remember all the NBC Sports vignettes from 2013 about a college football coach helming an English Premier League team, played by Jason Sudeikis. And since I got my new iPhone (shoutout to iPhone), with it came a free year of Apple TV+. And that, kids, is how I met your soccer coach. I mean Ted Lasso.

But seriously. I was expecting a comedy about a guy who was out of his element and didn’t know the first thing about soccer, and finding his way in England. That’s essentially what Ted Lasso is about, but I didn’t expect everything else that came with it. 

In the NBC vignettes, the team in question is Tottenham Hotspur. In the series, it’s AFC Richmond, who are a bottom-feeding team in the EPL, seemingly destined for relegation. But, why a college football coach? The answer is revealed very early on, as the team’s owner, Rebecca Welton (Hannah Waddingham) is left in charge of the team after her divorce from her husband (Anthony Head). In order to get back at her cheating ex-spouse by destroying the one thing she cares about, she hires Lasso in an attempt to ruin the team. Lasso’s folksy Americanism makes him come off as a rube in the first few episodes, but he eventually wins over both the owner and the team, not to mention its players, including the wily but blunt veteran Roy Kent (Brett Goldstein). 

The best part about the show is that it’s funny without being low-brow. And for that reason, it is a genuinely heartwarming series. You could go so many ways with both the premise and the character of Ted Lasso, but his character just cares so deeply about people that you just can’t help but root for him. Lasso goes through a divorce during the course of the show- an unexpected twist- and he struggles with having to keep a brave face in front of his son from across the pond, despite the fact that he very much still loves his wife and having to end their marriage is tearing him up inside. His relationship with other characters in the show is always serious, but always with the most positive intentions, and it ends up being infectious toward the others around him- whether it be a reporter who is incredibly skeptical of Lasso’s presence in the EPL and is fully prepared to ruin him in the press, to Kent, who deals with relationship issues involving another Richmond ex-player, to even Welton herself, who is coming to terms with her divorce and how it’s affecting her. Lasso has this happy-go-lucky energy about him, but despite being a fish out of water, he knows what he’s about and is much smarter than he looks. 

This show is, in my mind, the most underrated show on this list. The comedy is incredibly witty and the themes are relatable. The story has its twists and turns that leaves you wanting more (and more we shall have- the show was renewed for two more seasons already). The music is amazing- which was put together by Marcus Mumford of all people. If you take the plunge on Apple TV+, make this the first show you check out. Take a few hours out of your day and root for the little guy. Trust me, it’s worth it.
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It doesn’t matter who gets introduced in Sex Education, I just want the best for every single one of them, because they all deserve it. The British sitcom returned for series two, and it picks up on the single lingering question from series one- just what will Otis do now that he can finally masturbate? 

Do it literally everywhere, is the answer to that one, much to the horror of his mother Jean (Gillian Anderson).

But more than that, season two delves deeper into the relationships between the characters at Moordale High, and reaches new emotional (and relevant) depths than ever before. But, before all that can even happen, naturally a chlamydia outbreak sets us back on the path of Otis (Asa Butterfield) and Maeve (Emma Mackey) back on the sex clinic trail. 

As is a common theme throughout this list, Sex Education features more amazing character development and story arcs, with a number of them being some of the most indelible images of television from this year. 

I can’t talk to anyone about the show without first bringing up the Aimee (Aimee Lou Wood) story arc, which begins with a man ejaculating on her on a bus. While her reaction to the sexual assault (a shrug-off and downplaying Maeve’s intent on reporting it) feels initially set up to be a one-time thing, we find that it has more of an effect on Aimee than she anticipated. Instead, we get this amazing four-to-five episode arc of the impact it has on her life, from distancing herself from her boyfriend, to a detention session with Maeve and five other female characters from the show, wherein they discuss their separate experience with unwanted sexual harassment (later on, they destroy a car!), leading to a powerful and emotional scene where Aimee’s friends ride the bus with her, telling her that they have her back. 

There is SO much to unpack in this season. Maeve’s struggle with her drug-using mother and her newfound friendship (friendship?) with neighbor Isaac; The saga of Jean as the school’s sex educator, which draws the ire of Headmaster Groff; Jackson struggling with the pressure his mothers force on him to excel in the swimming pool; and, of course, Romeo and Juliet: the musical.

Relationships fall out and new ones bloom. We get more of Ola and Lily, and Jackson and Viv, as well as a complicated love triangle between Eric, Rahim and Adam. It’s all so good. And we watch these characters grow up as they come into themselves (and sometimes, each other!)

Finally, there’s Otis, who gets into a lot of trouble (see: the episode with the party), but we see him grow up so much throughout the season, particularly in the aftermath of said party episode, where he has a mini pregnancy-scare arc with popular girl Ruby. He realizes the error of his father’s ways and how much of an asshole he can be, and also finally confesses his love to Maeve… via voicemail, which is, I’m sure, where season three will pick up. 

Again, a show featuring the horniest teenagers on Netflix may not be everyone’s cup of tea. But what the show does best is make us realize that sex can sometimes seem like the most serious thing and the silliest thing at the same time. It’s often the physical comedy paired with the reactions of certain characters that make Sex Education truly funny (see: the S2 premiere where Jean catches Otis masturbating in the car while she’s returning from an errand) without being overly gross. It’s awkward but doesn’t induce second-hand embarrassment- it’s just all a part of growing up.
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I don’t remember if I said it on this blog or not, but I have previously stated somewhere in my life that Disney was perhaps the best thing to ever happen to the Star Wars franchise. After seeing The Rise of Skywalker, and watching it tear down everything they had built in The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi in exchange for woefully obvious fan service, I had to rethink my stance. Maybe Disney’s involvement in the saga wasn’t the best thing, after all. In the age of social media, nothing can ever be what it is anymore- it has to serve or relate to someone or something.  Did Disney… ruin Star Wars for me? For the better part of 10 months, I wasn’t sure of anything anymore.

But then the second season of The Mandalorian came out. Everyone’s favorite space dad and the brilliant, caring creative minds that crafted his story reminded me once again why I love this story- and this franchise- so much. Tasked with bringing The Child (or, as we now know him, Grogu) back to his kind, the second season picks up right where the first season left off. While the first half of the season sticks very much to its “space errands” formula, the major plot lines are never forgotten about, and carefully crafted to make sure that super important things, like the re-introduction of some familiar faces (Rosario Dawson and Temeura Morrison, for example), have their place in contributing to the main goal of the series. In what might be perceived as an ambitious move for the series, creator Jon Favreau has also masterfully weaved in characters and subplots from other places in the Star Wars catalogue (even including things thought to not be canon in the first place) and officially making them part of the “canon” of the series. He does it without it ever feeling forced. It feels earned. And because Mando is able to shift away from each of these things he encounters with every passing episode, the series doesn’t dwell on them for too long- leaving us always wanting to know what’s next. 

Stepping away from plot devices, let’s talk about the TEAM behind this. Favreau has once again gathered a crack team of directors to tell each episodic story, and each one encapsulates both their particular directing style- and the mood of the franchise- perfectly. Dave Filoni (of Clone Wars notoriety), gives us “The Jedi,” which is set up like a suspense thriller in a desolate forest. Robert Rodriguez gives us one of the best action sequences in the series with “The Tragedy.” Bryce Dallas Howard with “The Heiress” proves she has more of a grasp on this series than her father ever could- and delivers some of the juiciest plot points of the series in her 36-minute episode. Peyton Reed brings us “The Passenger,” which lands us on desolate ice planet Maldo Kries, not to mention some giant spiders and tons of despair. 

This series is breathtaking, both in its artistic and plot development, as well the sheer gravitas of the names attached to it. There are guest roles from Timothy Olymphant, Katee Sackhoff (reprising her role as Bo-Katan from Clone Wars and Rebels), WWE wrestler Sasha Banks (!!!), and Bill Burr, among others. Directors like Peyton Reed, Carl Weathers, and Rick Famuyiwa add their specific tastes to the series as well. Season two is even more evidence that The Mandalorian is put together by people who deeply care about Star Wars. They want the best for it; they want it to be reminiscent of the series they grew up with, while also keeping in mind what has been established already, while giving us a fresh storyline that is a breath of fresh air. I’m not sure about what’s going to happen in the future with all these new Disney+ shows that are coming out, but I can only hope they’ll be as good as this one, which is, in my opinion, the next great TV space western series. I hope you enjoyed this literal essay on what makes Star Wars great.
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How do I top The Mandalorian? With a cartoon horse and TONS of despair, that’s how!

Everyone’s favorite washed-up, trainwreck anthropomorphic horse returns for the second half of his final season on Netflix. When we left Bojack in October of 2019, we were left with the episode “A Quick One, While He’s Away,” where, just as it appears Bojack is beginning to reconnect with loved ones and potentially turn his life around, we see an episode featuring none of the five main characters- as we see the ripple effect Bojack’s actions have had on everyone around him, ending with his half-sister, Hollyhock, discovering Bojack’s near-encounter with Penny and Charlotte back in New Mexico, as well as reporters nearing the verge of the truth about Sarah Lynn’s death (as well as Bojack’s involvement). 

And we were left with THAT cliffhanger for almost four months. 

Part 2 sees Bojack begin a professorship at Wesleyan, where, although he tries his best, ends up watching his relationship with Hollyhock dissipate. This is in no small part to the issues we were reminded of in “A Quick One, While He’s Away,” closing in around him. As his past catches up to him, we see him making an attempt at reconciliation with his actions, but, in true Bojack form, sometimes you can’t get out of your own way enough. After a softball interview about the instance in New Mexico and his involvement in Sarah Lynn’s death, Bojack gives into his own hubris for a second interview, and botches it, becoming the most reviled celebrity in all of Hollywoo. One thing leads to another, and without his support system (we’ll get to why that might not be the worst thing), we (nearly) see Bojack tumbling down a hole we can’t follow him into.

As such, the penultimate episode, “The View from Halfway Down” might be one of the best episodes of television from this year. I can’t even bring myself to describe that acid trip of an episode, but it packs quite possibly the largest emotional punch of the entire series.

And, there’s the finale, “Fun While It Lasted.” Even though it was the “ending” that Netflix wanted for the series, is poignant and stripped down, with only the five main characters speaking during the episode. Pair it with the former episode, and we get not one, but TWO endings fitting of this roller-coaster of a series.

Just like the previous five and a half seasons, the character development remains stellar. We see those close to Bojack realize that maybe it’s high time they stopped putting their lives on hold for him. We see this particularly in Diane- who fittingly ends the series in a scene with Bojack- as she finally breaks through on writing her novel, though it’s nowhere near the topic she thought it would be - “Good Damage” is an excellent and accurate depiction of the writing process, by the way. We feel so happy for her that her writer’s block has ended, but also that she’s found the right guy (jokes) for her, who is a new, more positive support system. She makes peace with the fact that our damage doesn’t make us special- sometimes it just is something that exists, and that no good will come of it, and that’s okay.

Moving onto Princess Carolyn, Todd and Mr. Peanut Butter: all three find their own way even without Bojack in their lives. Despite breakups, miscarriages and bankruptcies, Princess Carolyn always lands on her feet. And we see her finally get everything she deserves- a baby (her adorable adopted hedgehog, Ruthie), a revival of her flailing career, and her dream wedding to Judah, the perfect partner in terms of both personal and professional life. We see Todd struggle with his relationship with with estranged mother, and we learn that what Todd lacks in IQ, he makes up for in EQ, or Emotional Quotient. His point about “turning yourself around” being really what the Hokey Pokey is all about is both dumb and incredibly poignant at the same time. And finally, there’s Mr. Peanut Butter, who finally realizes that being on your own isn’t the worst thing in the world. He embraces this change with the same optimism he’s known for. Also, he’s responsible for turning Hollywoo into Hollywoob. So there’s that.

You want to talk about criminally underrated shows? Look no further than Bojack Horseman. And I’m not even horsing around here (more bad jokes). Those rough first six episodes were worth something. Creator Raphael Bob-Waksberg doesn’t get enough credit for how carefully crafted this show is, with each moment perfectly encapsulating the feelings we feel every day, and perfectly illustrating the human experience. Thank you for six wonderful seasons, Bojack.
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I love Anya Taylor-Joy so goddamn much.

I also love chess now?

This brilliant adaptation of Walter Tevis’s 1983 novel of the same name features Anya Taylor-Joy as Beth Harmon, a chess prodigy who rises to the top of the chess world while dealing with emotional problems and substance abuse.

The series title definitely sounds British. Try it with your best English accent. The Queen’s Gambit. It does, right?

It’s not, the show takes place mainly in Kentucky. But, just about everyone in it is British, which is hilarious to me. Look! There’s Dudley from Harry Potter! And look over there! It’s the little boy from Love Actually dressed up as Indiana Jones playing chess!

For real though, this show is a masterwork of storytelling. We’re introduced to Beth Harmon waking up hungover and late for a match with Vasily Borgov in Paris. The rest of the story is entirely in flashback (and eventually catches up to the present). We find, in the early episodes, a newly orphaned Beth arrives at Methuen Home, meets Mr. Shaibel, learns how to play chess, and is introduced to tranquilizing pills. As the series progresses, we learn just how hungry Beth is to win at chess, and is clearly striving to be the best chess player in the world.

One of the best things about the series is the turnabout each character makes from foe to ally in Beth’s life. The first example of this is Alma Wheatley (Marielle Heller), who, despite having a rocky relationship with her husband- and seems into Beth’s chess success only for the financial benefits- ends up being a strong maternal figure for her, even if she essentially passed on her alcohol addition in the process. It also comes in the form of Beth’s various opponents, including Harry Beltik (Harry Melling), Townes (Jacob Fortune-Lloyd), and Benny Watts (Thomas Brodie-Sangster), as each one teaches her the finer points of the game, and how sometimes it takes a team to win a single player game. They recognize that Beth will hang herself out to dry if she tries to go at this game (not even chess, but life) alone. A moment toward the end of the series where Beth, Harry, and Benny are working through a chess problem together is truly heartwarming.

The other best thing about the series is the clarity of it. Chess is a complicated game at the outset. And once you understand how all the pieces work and how they move around, there are different strategies and angles to look at the game through. There are seemingly endless possibilities and routes to success in this game. The Queen’s Gambit makes chess accessible to people who don’t know much about it. This is evident in the resurgence of public interest in the game, with chess sets at an all-time high in the wake of the series premiere. Because the show makes you understand what’s happening on a fundamental and technical standpoint, it allows the drama to establish itself within the game. You feel the weight of each decision to move each particular piece- for me, it was the little nugget early on in the series where Beth learns that if you touch a piece, you have to move it- and how each move could potentially be life or death. 

From the opening moves, to the mid-game, all the way to the end game, The Queen’s Gambit is riveting. Ride the wave while you can and immerse yourself in that world, and fast.
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Early on, the pandemic took away my sports.

And I took that personally. 

And then, The Last Dance came to save us all. ESPN and Netflix’s joint venture to tell the story of Michael Jordan and the Chicago Bulls teams of the 1990s was downright epic, both in scope and in storytelling. 

The backstory here is that the Bulls hired a camera crew to document their 1997-98 season, which would eventually lead to the team’s sixth NBA championship in eight years. All the while, the footage from the season is intercut with the backstories of what is a who’s who of names and faces from that era of the franchise. Phil Jackson, Jerry Krause, Dennis Rodman, Scottie Pippin, Steve Kerr- the list goes on. But everyone knows from the outset that the story is really about Michael Jordan, his history and his legacy- from his days at North Carolina, to the early years of carrying the Bulls through the playoffs of the late 80s and early 90s, to cementing his status as a cultural icon, to the death of his father and his subsequent first retirement- The Last Dance manages to capture so much history in just 10 episodes. 

Still, The Last Dance gives the spotlight to each member of the organization and lends their story as parts to an overall whole. From the early days of the Jordan-Pippen dominance, and how an injury to Michael led the Bulls to hire Phil Jackson, who has his own unique philosophy about the game of basketball; which in turn lends itself to letting Dennis Rodman go out and miss four days of practices to hang out in Vegas, all while GM Jerry Krause continues to drive wedges between them all- for what seems like no apparent reason- it is a brilliant setup.

And on an even more fundamental level than that, it’s about a basketball team overcoming obstacles on the court. Jordan’s battles with Larry Bird and the Celtics, to some brutal fights with the “Bad Boys” Detroit Pistons, which leads into the selection of the dream team and the snubbing of Pistons point guard Isiah Thomas- for reasons Thomas still disputes to this day- and then the ultimate goal of winning as many championships as possible; The Last Dance connects the personal stories happening off the court to the story the people are more familiar with on the court. The whole time, no matter what, you’re left with the feeling that you know what happens in the end, but you’re still looking forward to what comes next; holding your breath in suspense at the game presented to you, or being left in awe of the athletic magic you just witnessed from a particular highlight of Jordan’s illustrious career.

It’s hard for me to critique a documentary series, at least from a filmmaking standpoint, outside of, maybe, editing. How do I argue with what actually happened in history? In the case of a sports documentary- sports being a subject I am fairly well-versed in- you simply can look at the bigger picture and ask yourself, why? Why did this team simply stop existing after this series ends? And will we ever see anything like it ever again? 

In regards to the series, I doubt we’ll see anything quite like this again (sorry, Tom Brady- I’m not sure how your upcoming series will compare). The fact that the footage shot by the camera crew was kept unseen for over 20 years, especially when we sports fans clamor for any and every piece of media we can get, is astounding. The scope of it all is magnificent, and it culminates with this celebration of joy and greatness. This was the television we needed for this pandemic. A sports soap opera the likes of which we may never have the pleasure of seeing again.


What TV did you enjoy this year? What were you bingeing? Leave a comment down below.

And don't forget to check out the rest of my "Best of 2020" spread by clicking HERE.

Ah yes, the annual “come see our shows” show for the Great White Way.

This year showed a massive improvement from last year in terms of quality in both the play and musical scene.

That’s right, both the play and musicals this season have been astoundingly impressive. Initially it was though that only the plays were going to stand out this year, with the likes of To Kill a Mockingbird, Network, The Ferryman, Choir Boy, The Waverly Gallery, Gary, and What the Constitution Means to Me all having standout spots on Broadway this year, many of which either announced or premiered in 2018.

But the musicals, never to be counted out, had a serious charge in the spring. Shows like Ain’t Too Proud, Beetlejuice, Tootsie, Hadestown, Oklahoma!, and even The Prom, which still continues to stay strong despite the onslaught of shows opening after it.

The performances were strong as well. Movie stars and veteran stage actors alike gave fantastic performances. Bryan Cranston, Jeff Daniels and Adam Driver, along with Paddy Considine and the incomparable Jeremy Pope highlight the Best Actor in a Play category, while the women have SIX nominees, including the likes of Laurie Metcalf (who we’ve never seen before), Janet McTeer, Elaine May (at the age of 87), and Annette Bening.

On the musical side, we saw spectacular musical performances this year… and dare I say there were too many to count?

The entire cast of Hadestown, including Eva Noblezada, Andre De Shields, Amber Gray, and Patrick Page.

The cast of The Prom: Caitlin Kinnunen, Beth Leavel, and Brooks Ashmanskas- even with fabulous supporting performances from Christopher Sieber, Angie Schworer and Michael Potts.

Careers could be made this year. Santino Fontana in Tootsie. Stephanie J. Block in The Cher Show. Ali Stroker in Oklahoma!. Ephraim Sykes in Ain’t Too Proud.

There were even performances from this year that didn’t get nominated (although why, I’m not sure). Bonnie Milligan in Head Over Heels stands out. Stephanie Styles in Kiss Me Kate does too. Tracy Letts in All My Sons. And countless more.

This was a really good year for Broadway, all things considered. And since the Tony Awards are on Sunday, let’s take a look at who’s walking home with those shiny little spinner things.

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The nominees:

• Ain’t Too Proud: The Life and Times of the Temptations
• Beetlejuice
• Hadestown
• The Prom
• Tootsie

For the first time in quite a while, we have a very likeable group of Best Musical nominees that I would be happy if any of them won.

Hadestown is the clear favorite, which means it’s Rachel Chavkin and Anaïs Mitchell’s New Orleans jazz/Greek tragedy fusion piece to lose. The show really is that good, and it’s worth every dollar (and trust me, some of these tickets may cost you every dollar you have) to see. Hadestown features an eclectic cast of actors including the Amber Gray, Patrick Page, Andre De Shields, Eva Noblezada, and Reeve Carney. The score is this really interesting jazz/folk/songwriter blend, with songs that you can actually (gasp) walk away singing? What a concept. And then there’s the stagecraft- absolutely brilliant lights, sound, costumes and set reminiscent of Rachel Chavkin’s previous endeavor, Natasha, Pierre & the Great Comet of 1812. And despite it being a story everyone knows (Orpheus and Eurydice), it still holds up as a brilliant retelling of an old classic, with twists and turns that still hit home. It’s the favorite for a reason, and I certainly thought the same when I saw it.

And then I saw The Prom.

As a preface, it is very difficult for me to cry while watching live theatre. So much has to go right, and if something ruins it for you (like a hearing aid going off throughout the entire second act of Hadestown), you feel like your money was wasted a little bit, and it’s unlikely you’ll be able to dish out another hefty sum of money to see something again. The show really has to take you to another place. It wasn’t until I saw Waitress with Sara Bareilles that I experienced such a thing.

So when I was a hot mess at the end of The Prom, even though I was sitting in the balcony, that showed me that I was seeing something special.

I went on a journey seeing this show. I went from really not being into it for the first 15 minutes or so, to the show literally sitting me down and saying “HEY. This is the reason why we go to the theatre. Give your critical eye a rest for two goddamn seconds and have FUN.” The twists. The turns. The emotions. The TEARS. What I see in this show is so much love, so much joy, so much “love is a good thing that we should be celebrating.” I see a lot of Head Over Heels in The Prom (it’s just done a lot better, sorry, Hudson family). I truly wanted to live in that world when I was watching it. And, funny enough, it has the fewest nominations of any of the Best Musical nominees (7).

The Prom is the right story for Tony voters to select it as Best Musical.

The other shows in this category are also formidable; props to the Wing for getting this category correct. Ain’t Too Proud has 12 Tony nominations, Tootsie, 11. Beetlejuice has 8. These shows are not here by accident.

I tend to overanalyze these things based on what the best-looking scenario is on paper. So, I’m going with my gut. Hadestown is not the next Hamilton (nor is it close), but it’s sure blowing up like it’s the next Evan Hansen, and that’s good enough for me. But trust me- Hadestown isn't going to run away with these awards like many thought it would.

And if there’s some kind of shocking twist, you can bet The Prom will best next in line for the crown.

Will win: Hadestown
Should win: Dare I say… The Prom?
Could win: Tootsie

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The nominees:

• Choir Boy by Tarell Alvin McCraney
• The Ferryman by Jez Butterworth
• Gary: A Sequel to Titus Andronicus by Taylor Mac
• Ink by James Graham
• What the Constitution Means to Me by Heidi Schreck

The biggest shock to this category was the exclusion of both To Kill a Mockingbird and Network, two plays that many surely considered locks, and potentially even contenders to win. But since those two are out, we have to deal with what we’re left with, which leaves the race pretty much wide open. One of the current favorites has to be Heidi Schreck’s What the Constitution Means to Me, which earned itself a nomination for the Pulitzer Prize for Drama. I think based on what the Tony Awards are, which is an enormous advertisement for Broadway so that tourists will come to New York and keep it afloat, giving Constitution the win seems like the obvious move. It’s political. It’s emotional. It’s timely. It is yet another “fuck you” from the theatre community to the American political machine. Which is why I think it would be an easy, relatable, safe choice to make. I’m not knocking What the Constitution Means to Me, but the praise that has been heaped on it and its Pulitzer Prize nomination signal that everyone’s riding that wave right into the Tony Awards.

But in my opinion, the Best Play of this category (and of this year) was The Ferryman. Despite changing casts midway through the run, it earned tremendous praise, including a Critic’s Pick from The New York Times. And just when I thought it had run out of momentum and Constitution was a lock to win, Ferryman picked up Best Play awards at the Drama Desk, Outer Critics’ Circle, and Drama League Awards, defeating Constitution at all three turns.

I’ve gone back and forth with this selection. Initially, and for the longest period of time, I had Heidi Schreck and Constitution pulling the upset. But now I’m going with my gut. Ferryman forever.

What time is it?

Will and should win: The Ferryman
Could win: What the Constitution Means to Me

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The nominees:

• Kiss Me, Kate
• Oklahoma!

Two extremely traditional shows received revamps this year. One of them was your typical, run-of-the-mill-revival- a squeaky-clean, Roundabout Theatre Company-subscriber-friendly remounting. The other was a complete re-imagining of an American classic, stripped down from its big Broadway roots of the 1930s and rebuilt “for the 21st century” in a small, intimate environment. The question is: which show will resonate with Tony voters more? I think because it tried to go to such great lengths, and to have a lot of it work, Oklahoma! will stand out further than Kiss Me, Kate will.

Will win: Oklahoma!
Could win: Kiss Me, Kate

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The nominees:

• All My Sons by Arthur Miller
• The Boys in the Band by Matt Crowley
• Burn This by Lanford Wilson
• Torch Song by Harvey Fierstein
• The Waverly Gallery by Kenneth Lonergan

This category is tough, because only two of the shows nominated are currently running. The other three were all early season shows that closed either before or shortly after January 2019. Of those two that are still running, Burn This is the better production (and I’m not just saying that because I work there- I work at Roundabout too, and I’ve seen All My Sons), but it all depends on which show resonates with voters more, or which ones the Wing chooses to remember the fondest. The Waverly Gallery has Elaine May and a Kenneth Lonergan nomination from last year going for it. Torch Song closed early, but garnered favorable reviews. The Boys in the Band was the first show to open in the 2018-19 season, but thanks to Ryan Murphy, will be getting a Netflix special made from it, reminding voters that it exists. I think, of the major production awards, this one is shrouded in the most mystery. Early on, The Waverly Gallery was the favorite, and I think that remains true heading into June. But don’t be surprised if The Boys in the Band or Burn This pull the upset.

Will win: The Waverly Gallery
Could win: The Boys in the Band or Burn This

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The nominees:

• Brooks Ashmanskas, The Prom
• Derrick Baskin, Ain’t Too Proud: The Life and Times of the Temptations
• Alex Brightman, Beetlejuice
• Damon Daunno, Oklahoma!
• Santino Fontana, Tootsie

Five men, five vastly different stories. There’s been some controversy surrounding Tootsie, but if I could stick my nose where it might not belong for two seconds, Michael Dorsey is supposed to a terrible person. He’s so despicable that obviously folks are going to hate him for dressing up as a woman to try to get a role. I think that might be the point. Still, I think Santino’s got it in the bag, since he’s got to carry the show. The other four nominees are matched (or overshadowed) by others in their cast, so I think we’ll see the “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend” actor take home his first Tony.

Will win: Santino Fontana, Tootsie
Could win: Alex Brightman, Beetlejuice or Damon Daunno, Oklahoma!

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The nominees:

• Stephanie J. Block, The Cher Show
• Caitlin Kinnunen, The Prom
• Beth Leavel, The Prom
• Eva Noblezada, Hadestown
• Kelli O’Hara, Kiss Me, Kate

Every year seems like it will be THE year for Stephanie J. Block. It’s interesting that people say that, considering she’s only been nominated twice previously for Tony Awards. But her competition isn’t as strong this year. Caitlin Kinnunen and Beth Leavel likely will cancel each other out, as both are equally strong in The Prom for different reasons. Eva Noblezada gets swallowed up in the vast cavalcade of talent that is Hadestown, and I don’t think Kiss Me, Kate is strong enough as a production for Kelli O’Hara to carry it on her back (even though she carries that entire show on her back). Cher is a generational talent, and Stephanie J. Block’s turn as Star Cher will likely make her stand out from the group. It’s finally her time, guys!

Will and should win: Stephanie J. Block, The Cher Show
Could win: Beth Leavel or Caitlin Kinnunen, The Prom

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The nominees:

• Paddy Considine, The Ferryman
• Bryan Cranston, Network
• Jeff Daniels, To Kill a Mockingbird
• Adam Driver, Burn This
• Jeremy Pope, Choir Boy

This is another interesting category shrouded in some mystery. It appears to be the big three film and TV stars in the front of the pack: Bryan Cranston’s Howard Beale from Network, Adam Driver’s portrayal of the hyperactive Pale in the Burn This revival, and Jeff Daniels’ turn as the iconic Atticus Finch in Aaron Sorkin’s To Kill a Mockingbird. Cranston has this very unique ability to play to both a live camera and a live audience at the same damn time. That has to count for something. He also won the Olivier for his performance in Network, and he’ll be competing against Paddy Considine, who was also nominated for The Ferryman once again. But Cranston seems to have lost a lot of momentum, and his inclusion with this very strong group of equally good actors could split his chances. Jeff Daniels has the mighty task of playing Atticus Finch… but dare I say that any other actor of his stature in that position could play the brilliant orator that is Atticus? Let me hit you with that third option- Adam Driver. Pale is not a role that anyone could play. It’s a roller-coaster of a time on stage. He’s full of so many emotions- and all of them begin at a 10 and seem to just spiral out of control. Rage, grief, love, frustration, confusion- it’s all there to the “volcanic” (as the Times put it) Driver. In a late surge of momentum, The Wing awards the Tony to one of Hollywood’s best young actors. Driver wins in something of an upset.

Will and should win: Adam Driver, Burn This
Could win: Bryan Cranston, Network or Jeff Daniels, To Kill a Mockingbird

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The nominees:

• Annette Bening, All My Sons
• Laura Donnelly, The Ferryman
• Elaine May, The Waverly Gallery
• Janet McTeer, Bernhardt/Hamlet
• Laurie Metcalf, Hillary and Clinton
• Heidi Schreck, What the Constitution Means to Me

Everybody’s been on the Elaine May train since The Waverly Gallery opened. The 87 year-old would be receiving her first Tony nomination, and a win would make her the oldest Tony Award winner ever for an acting category. In her way are five other brilliant nominees. I really love that they nominated Janet McTeer for Bernhardt/Hamlet, a super underrated performance in this blogger’s opinion. If I were running the Tony’s, Laura Donnelly would win for her powerful performance in The Ferryman. That play is not about Quinn or any of the kids, it’s about Caitlin, and thanks to Donnelly, that becomes blatantly clear over the course of the show. But I haven’t been given any reason to think she’ll win, considering Ferryman changed their cast over about midway through the run. We’re going with Elaine May, who hasn’t had any doubt challenge her this season.

Will win: Elaine May, The Waverly Gallery
Should win: Laura Donnelly, The Ferryman
Could win: Janet McTeer, Bernhardt/Hamlet or Laurie Metcalf, Hilary and Clinton

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The nominees:

• Andre De Shields, Hadestown
• Andy Grotelueschen, Tootsie
• Patrick Page, Hadestown
• Jeremy Pope, Ain’t Too Proud: The Life and Times of the Temptations
• Ephraim Sykes, Ain’t Too Proud: The Life and Times of the Temptations

When I saw Hadestown, I was more impressed with Patrick Page than I was with Andre De Shields. Still, Andre was playing Andre, which should fare well with Tony voters. The inclusion of both Ephraim Sykes and Jeremy Pope (who is being nominated for two different acting categories this year) certain makes things interesting as well. Will the Wing honor his fantastic achievements in both Ain’t Too Proud and Choir Boy in this category? I think we’re going with tradition here and picking Andre De Shields, further bolstering Hadestown’s bid for Best Musical.

Will win: Andre De Shields, Hadestown
Should win: Ephraim Sykes, Ain’t Too Proud
Could win: Patrick Page, Hadestown or Jeremy Pope, Ain’t Too Proud

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The nominees:

• Lilli Cooper, Tootsie
• Amber Gray, Hadestown
• Sarah Stiles, Tootsie
• Ali Stroker, Oklahoma!
• Mary Testa, Oklahoma!

It’s Amber Gray against Ali Stroker. Both are fantastic and both deserve to win. But the real story is the exclusion of Bonnie Milligan from Head Over Heels, who made a noteworthy debut on Broadway to hardly any fanfare. If anyone deserved to be here most, it was her. I don’t think Mary Testa’s inclusion in the category hinders Ali Stroker’s chances of winning, and in fact, I think she’s got this one locked up.

Will and should win: Ali Stroker, Oklahoma!
Could win: Amber Gray, Hadestown or Sarah Stiles, Tootsie

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The nominees:

• Bertie Carvel, Ink
• Robin de Jesus, The Boys in the Band
• Gideon Glick, To Kill a Mockingbird
• Brandon Uranowitz, Burn This
• Benjamin Walker, All My Sons

My gut is to pick Brandon Uranowitz for this category, and not just because I work at Burn This. I firmly believe he gave the best performance out of these five. People are still talking about Bertie Carvel’s turn as Rupert Murdoch from Ink, but I think if Burn This gets any kind of award at the Tony’s, it’s for Uranowitz’s brilliant turn as Larry in the Lanford Wilson revival.

Will and should win: Brandon Uranowitz, Burn This
Could win: Bertie Carvel, Ink

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The nominees:

• Fionnula Flanagan, The Ferryman
• Celia Keenan-Bolger, To Kill a Mockingbird
• Kristine Nielsen, Gary: A Sequel to Titus Andronicus
• Julie White, Gary: A Sequel to Titus Andronicus
• Ruth Wilson, King Lear

There’s not much of a contest here. Ever since casting was announced for To Kill a Mockingbird, Celia Keenan-Bolger has been mentioned right along with Jeff Daniels every step of the way. Scout is a hefty part of the book, with some even considering her to be the central character of Harper Lee’s iconic novel. Kristine Nielsen replaced Andrea Martin before Gary started previews, so her role has to be a juicy one as well. But Celia is as close to a leading character as you can get in this one. No contest. CKB wins her first Tony.

Will and should win: Celia Keenan-Bolger, To Kill a Mockingbird
Could win: Kristine Nielsen, Gary: A Sequel to Titus Andronicus

The nominees:

• Dominique Morisseau, Ain’t Too Proud
• Scott Brown and Anthony King, Beetlejuice
• Anaïs Mitchell, Hadestown
• Chad Beguelin and Bob Martin, The Prom
• Robert Horn, Tootsie

I want to make this clear- Hadestown doesn’t really have a book. And if it does, it’s not spectacular in comparison to the others it’s going up against. The two that I think have the best chance are Tootsie and The Prom. Tootsie because it’s one joke after another, and in comparison to the score, it’s the stronger of the two; The Prom because it’s just so pure, full of wit and full of love written by people who clearly love the craft they’ve dedicated their lives to. If The Prom steals one here, I wouldn’t be mad- nor would I be shocked, considering Bob Martin won a Tony for writing The Drowsy Chaperone. But I’m picking Tootsie here.

Will and should win: Robert Horn, Tootsie
Could win: Chad Beguelin and Bob Martin, The Prom

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The nominees:

• Joe Iconis, Be More Chill
• Eddie Perfect, Beetlejuice
• Anaïs Mitchell, Hadestown
• Matthew Sklar and Chad Beguelin, The Prom
• Adam Guettel, To Kill a Mockingbird
• David Yazbek, Tootsie

Now we get into the strong suit for Hadestown- the score. It started as a concept album, but Anaïs Mitchell’s music has evolved into a musical phenomenon. As I mentioned before, it’s this really cool jazz/indie/folk/singer-songwriter fusion that is extremely catchy, and while the first act has all the bops, the second act uses those bops to sew the story all together. Hadestown’s biggest competition is The Prom, once again, as Matthew Sklar and Chad Beguelin deliver another potential winner, also full of earworms and inspirational tracks. Also, I want to deliver the biggest applause ever to Be More Chill, who are obviously going to hang onto this one nomination they have for years to come.

Will and should win: Anaïs Mitchell, Hadestown
Could win: Matthew Sklar and Chad Beguelin, The Prom

​

The nominees:

• Michael Chorney and Todd Sickafoose, Hadestown
• Simon Hale, Tootsie
• Larry Hochman, Kiss Me, Kate
• Daniel Kluger, Oklahoma!
• Harold Wheeler, Ain’t Too Proud

I personally think the orchestrations for Oklahoma! are brilliant. Daniel Kluger takes Rodgers and Hammerstein’s iconic score and reworks it for a more modern, jamboree,  bluegrass-type feel. But I feel like Hadestown’s got it locked up. It’s got fascinating instrumentation (violin, cello, trombone, guitar, bass, piano, drums) to achieve this sort of hollowed-out, thrown together feel, but it also has the ability, along with the strength of the vocal arrangements, to create this gorgeous wall of sound. Hadestown has it.

Will and should win: Michael Chorney and Todd Sickafoose, Hadestown
Could win: Daniel Kluger, Oklahoma!

The nominees:

• Rachel Chavkin, Hadestown
• Scott Ellis, Tootsie
• Daniel Fish, Oklahoma!
• Des McAnuff, Ain’t Too Proud
• Casey Nicholaw, The Prom

Any of these people could win a Tony for Best Director of a Musical and I would not be upset. All five have done incredible work with this respectable set of musicals. However, since Hadestown is the favorite, and because Rachel Chavkin was not honored for her work on Great Comet, she takes home the Tony for her work on Hadestown.

Will and should win: Rachel Chavkin, Hadestown
Could win: Hadestown has the best chance, but literally anyone could win and I wouldn't be mad.

​

The nominees:

• Rupert Goold, Ink
• Sam Mendes, The Ferryman
• Bartlett Sher, To Kill a Mockingbird
• Ivo van Hove, Network
• George C. Wolfe, Gary: A Sequel to Titus Andronicus

Scott Rudin pissed a lot of people off when he forced several regional and community theatres to give up the rights to other versions of To Kill a Mockingbird, before giving those theatres the rights back, on the condition that they perform exclusively Aaron Sorkin’s version. This debacle was a terrible PR move, and a lack of a nomination for Best Play was probably the Wing sticking it to Rudin. However, if there’s any consolation prize, it’s for Bartlett Sher, who directed the piece. Scott Rudin might not be winning a Tony this year, but at least they’re honoring this gigantic achievement of a play.

Will win: Bartlett Sher, To Kill a Mockingbird
Should win: Sam Mendes, The Ferryman
Could win: Ivo Van Hove, Network

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The nominees:

• Camille A Brown, Choir Boy
• Warren Carlyle, Kiss Me, Kate
• Denis Jones, Tootsie
• David Neumann, Hadestown
• Sergio Trujillo, Ain’t Too Proud

There’s one show that has this award locked up and one show only. It’s Kiss Me, Kate, obviously. That “Too Darn Hot” is LIT. Warren Carlyle takes home his second Tony Award.

Will win: Warren Carlyle, Kiss Me, Kate
Could win: David Neumann, Hadestown or Sergio Trujillo, Ain’t Too Proud

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The nominees:

• Ain’t Too Proud- Robert Brill and Peter Nigrini
• Beetlejuice- David Korins
• Hadestown- Rachel Huack
• King Kong- Peter England
• Oklahoma!- Laura Jellinek

I am curious as to how they’ll recognize King Kong’s enormous ape puppet this year, considering the puppetry team is receiving an honorary award for their work. I am also curious to see how the enormous house set for Beetlejuice stacks up against Hadestown's intricate, moving set. I'm going to give the edge to Rachel Huack. I enjoy the use of turntables and trapdoors.

Will win: Hadestown- Rachel Huack
Could win: Beetlejuice- David Korins

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The nominees:

• The Ferryman- Rob Howell
• Gary: A Sequel to Titus Andronicus- Santo Loquasto
• Ink- Bunny Christie
• Network- Jan Versweyveld
• To Kill a Mockingbird- Miriam Buether

Another question is video and projection design, which is heavily utilized by a play like Network, using live cameras, cutaways, glass, and even the outside world as a set, in true Ivo Van Hove style. I think Network wins because of this, even though both sets for Gary and The Ferryman are impressive, but I feel like we should have more awards for impressive technical specs like projections. Hopefully changes (or at least more specific rulings) to the awards are coming as technology in Broadway shows is becoming more advanced.

Will win: Network- Jan Versweyveld
Could win: Gary: A Sequel to Titus Andronicus- Santo Loquasto or The Ferryman- Rob Howell

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The nominees:

• Ain’t Too Proud- Paul Tazewell
• Beetlejuice- William Ivey Long
• The Cher Show- Bob Mackie
• Hadestown- Michael Krass
• Tootsie- William Ivey Long

Beetlejuice’s costumes are spectacular: an eclectic array of monsters and ghouls. Because, you know, it’s a show about death. The next closest challenger would probably be The Cher Show, because Cher is, well, Cher. For all I know Hadestown could probably steal this one too.

Will win: Beetlejuice- William Ivey Long
Could win: The Cher Show- Bob Mackie or Tootsie- William Ivey Long

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The nominees:

• Bernhardt/Hamlet- Toni-Leslie James
• The Ferryman- Rob Howell
• Gary: A Sequel to Titus Andronicus- Ann Roth
• To Kill a Mockingbird- Ann Roth
• Torch Song- Clint Ramos

In this next round of arbitrarily picking Tony winners, we have Best Costume Design of a Play. I’m picking Mockingbird because I really hope there’s a ham costume that Scout wears.

Will win: To Kill a Mockingbird- Ann Roth
Could win: Bernhardt/Hamlet- Toni-Leslie James

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The nominees:

• Ain’t Too Proud- Howell Binkley
• Beetlejuice- Kenneth Posner and Peter Nigrini
• The Cher Show- Kevin Adams
• Hadestown- Bradley King
• King Kong- Peter Mumford

THE SWINGING LIGHTS OF HADESTOWN. That is all. Beetlejuice would be a close second.

Will and should win: Hadestown- Bradley King
Could win: Beetlejuice- Kenneth Posner and Peter Nigrini

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The nominees:

• The Ferryman- Peter Mumford
• Gary: A Sequel to Titus Andronicus- Jules Fisher and Peggy Eisenhauer
• Ink- Neil Austin
• Network- Jan Versweyveld and Tal Yarden
• To Kill a Mockingbird- Jennifer Tipton

I can see Network winning here. I can see Gary winning. I can also see The Ferryman winning. Something about that incredible show has to be honored for creating the sinister mood that is prevalent throughout the show. In a purely random call, Peter Mumford wins for The Ferryman.

Will win: The Ferryman- Peter Mumford
Could win: Network- Jan Versweyveld and Tal Yarden or Gary: A Sequel to Titus Andronicus- Jules Fisher and Peggy Eisenhauer

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The nominees:

• Ain’t Too Proud- Steve Canyon Kennedy
• Beetlejuice- Peter Hylenski
• Hadestown- Nevin Steinberg and Jessica Paz
• King Kong- Peter Hylenski
• Oklahoma!- Drew Levy

Sound design in musicals is tough. I suppose it’s how well created sounds blend with existing music. If that’s the case, I could see Beetlejuice winning here, as there are LOTS of extra sounds in addition to the music. But it could also be how well the sound is transferred around the theatre, where the advantage would favor Hadestown and especially Oklahoma!, where interesting orchestrations and different theatre spaces might yield an award. All of these are reasons why I have zero clue what I’m talking about. Hadestown for the win. Again.

Will win: Hadestown- Nevin Steinberg and Jessica Paz
Could win: Beetlejuice- Peter Hylenski or Oklahoma!- Drew Levy

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The nominees:

• Choir Boy- Fitz Patton
• The Ferryman- Nick Powell
• Ink- Adam Cork
• Network- Eric Seichim
• To Kill a Mockingbird- Scott Lehrer

For plays, I can understand it a little bit better. I can see Network taking home yet another tech award for its pretty similar replication to the movie. I think it’s a pretty safe bet.

Will win: Network- Eric Seichim
Could win: The Ferryman- Nick Powell or To Kill a Mockingbird- Scott Lehrer


And thus ends another round of completely random, logic-based Tony predictions. 


Who's your pick to win Best Musical? Leave a comment down below. 

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Tune in to the 73rd Annual Tony Awards on Sunday, June 9th at 8:00pm only on CBS.

The most recent episode of Black Mirror, in my opinion, is the biggest dud. Letitia Wright and Douglas Hodge give great performances, Wright in particular, who pulls the rug out from under Hodge’s Rolo Haynes in the episode’s final act, but I thought the stories were as a whole fairly uninteresting, and the plot twist at the end didn’t pack much of a punch. Overall, the episode is just flimsy. Shout out to Penn Jillette, though, whose short story “The Pain Addict” serves as inspiration for the first of the three stories in the episode. Fun fact, though: “Black Museum” actually contains multiple easter eggs, with a reference to every previous Black Mirror episode present in the season 4 finale. ​

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I will give this episode credit for preceding the political climate America finds itself in today, but I think “The Waldo Moment” is a bit too on the nose. Oversaturation of news and the subsequent analysis done by both journalists and comedians alike can certainly cause us to think outside the box when it comes to determining leadership. And so, when Daniel Rigby’s Jamie Salter tries to flip the system, we find it logical for him to do so. It’s just… the Bear, Waldo, itself, is just ridiculous. And if I have to listen to him say “Hey! Mr. Monroe!” One more time, I’m gonna jump through a table. “The Waldo Moment” does beg the question, however, while we’re on the subject of electing fictitious people as leaders, there’s some clause in the Constitution that says Mickey Mouse can’t be President, right? Asking for a few hundred million friends. ​

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Season 4, Episode 2​

A lot of people really like Daniel Kaluuya’s monologue at the end of “Fifteen Million Merits.” And I do too. It’s an impassioned, rambling speech about authenticity. But at the same time, it’s about what we’ve already known in after watching for the last hour- that absolutely nothing is real in the world of “Fifteen Million Merits.” I felt like this episode is so far out of left field in comparison to the episode before it (“The National Anthem”) and just about every episode after it. It tries to do too much with all of its concepts layered on top of each other, that we’re not sure what to focus on. This is the first episode to feature the song “Anyone Who Knows What Love Is (Will Understand)” by Irma Thomas, so it’s got that going for it. ​

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Season 2, Episode 4​

​I love Jon Hamm, I really do. Hamm’s character in the first sub-story of “White Christmas” is quintessentially Hamm-ian, as he works as a torturer by day, and a seduction coach by night, being so suavely pleasant all the way. But Rafe Spall steals the show here. We see the full depth of his grief, seeing as he’s handled his divorce in… let’s say a very sub-par way. When he sees his child for the first time, it’s truly heartbreaking. The strength of “White Christmas” comes from its major plot twist, though, as the tales of deception and murder come full circle back into the present. Both characters are terrible people, but they gain our sympathy, and we end up feeling bad for them as both of their lives ultimately crumble by the end of this twisty-turny episode. Post-episode funks are the gifts that keep on giving in Charlie Brooker’s world. Merry Christmas?

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Interactive Movie​

​I approve of the decision to move filming of this episode from Scotland to Iceland. The visuals of this episode stand out more than any other, with shots of stunning landscapes serving as the backdrop for this intriguing “memory heist” story. Andrea Riseborough really makes us wonder what “Crocodile”’s title really implies, and whether or not she truly feels remorse for any or her actions, and because all of her actions make sense, it is easy for us to go back and forth on wanting her to escape and wanting her to get caught. The finale of the episode is heartbreaking. She should have checked on the fucking guinea pig. THE GUINEA PIG.

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Upon first watch, I wasn’t a big fan of “Shut Up and Dance.” I thought it was too formulaic, and the ending wasn’t as satisfying as I wanted it to be. But after consideration, sometimes there’s nothing wrong with formula if it is done well... and you're in the right mindset to watch this episode- truthfully, I binged "Nosedive," "Playtest" and this one in a row and was clocked out from being beaten over the head by allegories. Alex Lawther’s Kenny is blackmailed into following seemingly aimless directions after he is caught on camera masturbating to images on his computer, with the assumption that if Alex completes his instructions, his act will not be broadcasted to his friends and family. He is plunged into a tense game of follow-the-leader, and gets entwined with Hector (Jerome Flynn), another man being blackmailed by the same group. Of course though, in true Black Mirror style, we find that no one can truly outrun their sins. The final moments of the episode, specifically Alex’s final emotional state, the slow motion camera work, and the music (Radiohead’s “Exit Music (For a Film)”) are chilling. ​

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As someone who shamelessly utilizes online dating apps, this episode struck a chord with me. The simple but brilliantly designed premise of people being matched by a Siri-like assistant (“Coach”) for a predetermined amount of time, as part of a grander attempt to find an “ultimate compatible other” is played out to a delightfully surprising ending by Georgina Campbell and Joe Cole. You can feel the ups and downs that people looking for love experience- the highs of being with and having fun with someone in a spontaneous moment of bliss, as well as the bitter feeling of loneliness that everyone has experienced at one time or another. And with a brilliant score by Sigor Ròs, it only elevates the experienced further. Man, if only Tinder was like this. The system would truly never be wrong. ​

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​A new segment on the Wrap Sheet is called:
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Speaking of movies, the Oscars were last Sunday.

Let’s talk about those, because I have some things I want to get off my chest.

There was much debate about a host-less awards, and how it would affect the ceremony.

When Kevin Hart stepped down from hosting, there was a mad dash to find a replacement, but no suitable person (or Muppet) could be found.

And while Kevin Hart would have been a funny, effective host, I think an Oscars without a host moved along smoothly and was just as effective.

I watched the show with people who complained that the show was boring, and that a host could have made it more entertaining to watch.

On that point, I disagree. If you’re invested, the Oscars are just as enticing without a host as they are without one.

Also, the show ran 3 hours and 22 minutes, almost a half hour shorter than last year’s. I am more than willing to sacrifice time for entertainment. A four hour Oscars is unbearable.

If you’re going to have an Oscar host, their duties should at least be hands off. A welcome, an opening monologue, and a closing- maybe like ONE bit intermittently. That’s really all we need. I like Jimmy Kimmel, but I don’t need him talking to celebrities like he does every night on his show, nor do I need him “surprising” random people off the street by bringing them into the theatre.

I’m also a fan of montages, and I felt like we could have had more of that.

Also, they didn’t do any favors for themselves in showing all the awards live. For at least the first hour or so, the speeches were BAD.

I don’t want to watch people stumble through pieces of paper and not know what they’re going to say. You need to keep it interesting. Even if you don’t think you’re going to win, have a speech. Practice that speech. It will make you more watchable.

As for the awards themselves, I didn’t do as well as last year, going 16/24 in 2019 versus 21/24 in 2018.

Ordinarily I would scoff at a stunt like this, but I laughed. A lot. It was totally unexpected for a pair of hockey players to break out into a dance after squaring up to fight.

I don’t know who these guys are, but look at that FORM! This is some Olympic style ice dancing here.

We all have to remember that sports are fun. Sometimes we can all use a little bit of a laugh during some friendly competition.



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I’m sorry I’m so late on the wrap sheet (again), you guys. February was just too short, and I promise that with 31 days in March, you’ll have next month’s on schedule.

Stay alert out there.

Andrew

It’s cold.

It’s very, very cold.

Like, some places in the Midwest are colder than Antarctica.
​

The Polar Vortex is here and it is running rampant on cities like Chicago and Minneapolis. Temperatures colder than 20 below zero. Wind chills reach as far as 50 below. ​

Remember how climate change is a thing?

Look at this person throwing water on glass in Chicago and LOOK HOW FAST IT FREEZES.

January has 31 days in it, and dear God did this month feel like it had 31 days in it. There’s lots to talk about. A lot of it is good, some of it is not so good, but it all happened.

Let’s begin the first Wrap Sheet of 2019 on New Year’s Day, as Anderson Cooper took shots with Andy Cohen before the ball dropped. And, my goodness, was Cooper’s shot face absolutely priceless.
​

Now, I’m not one for taking straight shots of anything, so I would probably have this kind of reaction as well, but I don’t think mine involved literal squawking.

Cohen and Cooper did shots at every top of the hour leading up to the stroke of midnight, and you would think that after seeing and hearing Anderson’s shot face, it would lose its luster after the first time.

It doesn’t. It’s just as funny after the third shot as it is after the first.
What else happened this month…

​OH YES!

There were a bunch of Democrats sworn into Congress, as the blue party reclaimed the majority in the House of Representatives during the 2018 midterm elections, the first major referendum of Donald Trump’s presidency.

A record 127 women were sworn into Congress, 106 of them Democrats. 25 women (17 of them Democrats) were sworn into the Senate. Overall, women make up 24 percent of the U.S. Congress, which makes history for not just an outstanding number of women, but also the number of African-American and Hispanic members sworn in.

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For the first time, two Muslim-American women were elected: Ilhan Omar (D-MN, America’s first Somali-American Congresswoman) and Rashida Tlaib (D-MI).
​

Two Native American women were also sworn in on Inauguration Day: Deb Haaland (D-NM) and Sharice Davids (D-KS). Davids is the first openly-LGBT representative of any kind from Kansas, defeating her Republican opponent by nearly a double-digit margin.
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The midterms marked the first time states like Connecticut and Massachusetts elected black women, as Jahana Hayes (D-CT) and Ayanna Pressley (D-MA) were both sworn in.
​

Sylvia Garcia and Veronica Escobar, both Democrats from Texas, became the state’s first Latinas sworn into Congress. Pretty impressive, considering 40 percent of the state is Latino.
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Arizona elected two female senators, Kyrsten Sinema and Martha McSally. Sinema is the first openly bisexual woman ever elected to the senate, and became the first Democrat in 30 years to win a senate seat from Arizona. Iowa also elected its first two Congresswomen, as Cindy Axne and Abby Finkenauer defeated male Republican incumbents.
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And then, there is Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, my new favorite human of all time.
​

​AOC is the youngest woman ever elected to Congress, representing New York’s 14th district.

She’s a former organizer for Bernie Sanders, a fierce critic of Donald Trump, and a staunch progressive with a super strong social media presence. She’s an advocate for “generational, racial, and ideological change.”

She also knows how to use social media (which is more than literally every other politician can say), and she’s my spirit animal.

​

And then this story dropped about Ocasio-Cortez wearing some fancy shoes to work. Republican Congressmen called her out for being hypocritical, advocating for economic change in the middle and lower class while wearing nice clothes.

And homegirl clapped BACK.

​

The fact that wrinkly old white men are trying to cut down a 29-year old woman shows me immediately that they feel threatened by her. It shows me that the Millennials are coming, and that the outlook for the Baby Boomers (at least in government) looks grim. ​
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I want to touch on some sports things very quickly, because a lot of you are upset that the Patriots are in the Super Bowl again.

I also want to reiterate that no one cares what you think. If you’re so sick of the Patriots winning all the time, maybe you should learn how to beat them.

They’re cheaters but they have the refs in their pockets? Okay. Keep grabbing at those straws. First rule of getting out of the hole: Stop digging.

​

But speaking of some ref ball being played, let’s talk about the NFC Championship. In particular, let’s talk about the no-call made in the fourth quarter with the game essentially on the line, when Rams CB Nickell Robey-Coleman flattened Saints WR TommyLee Lewis that should have drawn a pass interference call, or an unnecessary roughness foul. Either of the two would have given the Saints a first down, where they could have run the clock all the way down and kicked a game-winning field goal to send them to the Super Bowl.

But that didn’t happen. There was no call.

I don’t believe for one second that there’s any corruption to be had between the Rams and the referees. Sure, there have been reports that four of the officials from the game have Southern California ties, but I highly doubt that there was a blatant attempt to get the Rams to the Super Bowl.

If you want to talk NFL conspiracy theories, wouldn’t the main motive of the conspiracy be to get the Saints to the Super Bowl so Brees and Brady can have an all-time classic in the Super Bowl?

If anything, it's as if the NFL was trying to get a Rams/Chiefs Super Bowl, seemingly knowing the Chiefs would defeat the Patriots. 

That last point made zero sense. I digress.

There should have been a flag thrown. The Saints got hosed on the call.

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​But they also had the ball first in overtime and Drew Brees threw an interception. So there’s that. You had a chance to win the game (and you probably should have), and you couldn’t.

And now, because of your own team’s shortcomings, you (and by you, I am referring to Saints fans) have placed the blame on anyone but your own team, and are actually calling for the Commissioner to invoke an obscure rule that would allow the game to be restarted at that exact point, in hopes that your team would win the game.

What (and I cannot stress this enough) the actual fuck is the matter with you?

Stop whining. Everyone was sympathetic for you before, but now it’s just annoying. You’re going to boycott watching the Super Bowl?

Great. Your team isn’t playing in it anyways. See if the rest of the country cares.

It is NOT the league’s fault that your team has had two heartbreak playoff losses in consecutive seasons. When it comes down to it, it is your own fault.

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When all Marcus Williams had to do was tackle Stefon Diggs in the Divisional Playoff last year, he couldn’t. The Vikings won the game on a walk-off touchdown. You had all the momentum in that game, coming back from 17-0.

You were up 13-0 at HOME in this one. You were up 20-10 in the third quarter. You should win that game regardless. But you couldn’t hold the Rams and had to settle for overtime.

And for all the complaining that people did for overtime in the New England-Kansas City game, the Saints had the ball first.

It was a shitty call (or, no-call) at the worst possible moment. Unfortunately, these things happen. Calls get blown. Sorry about it.

I have always thought it would be a good idea for the NFL to adopt the CFL’s policy of making pass interference reviewable (in fact, it would have been good to have on the OT interception, as I still don’t think the ball was tipped coming out of Brees’ hands, where John Johnson had to essentially tackle the receiver he was covering before making the pick).

GOD I could go off on the state of professional football in some kind of rambling and all the bullshit that’s gone on between the league, its players and its fans in the past five years.

​But that’s another story for another day. Let’s talk about gymnastics, yes?
​

​This is Katelyn Ohashi. She’s a junior at UCLA, and she’s really good at gymnastics, you guys.

This is her floor routine at the 2019 collegiate challenge.

Ohashi has been on the world stage before, actually defeating U.S. teammate Simone Biles in the American Cup back in 2013. However, various injuries and subsequent surgeries have kept her from competing at the elite level since early 2014.

But this… this is impressive. Like, this is a jaw-droppingly good routine.

Another thing that strikes me about this routine is the sheer elation and love for the sport. It’s the best when you can see the pure joy on someone’s face when they’re doing (and thriving at) what they love. Ohashi looks so damn happy as she dances around the mat (and also every single one of those maneuvers though…) and it’s really difficult not to smile while watching that video.

This routine was, as you can guess, a perfect ten- the fourth perfect ten floor routine of her career.

You’re a gem, Katelyn Ohashi. Thank you for brightening the internet with your passion and excitement for your sport.

In absurd news, there was an egg that took the internet by storm, garnering the most likes on a single Instagram picture.

And it’s not any kind of special egg.

It’s just an egg.

This egg.

​The egg surpassed Kylie Jenner’s previously most-liked photo of her newborn baby clutching her finger. Before the egg, Jenner’s post had amassed 18.1 million likes.

As of writing, this egg (posted by the account @world_record_egg) has garnered 52 million likes, shattering the previous record.

This thing spread like wildfire- and it’s not like there was any sort of annoying mass social media campaign or anything. I think I saw it maybe two or three times total.

“Hey, look at this picture of an egg. You should like it.”

“This is very wholesome. I will like it.”

And then 52 million other people thought the same way.

Kylie Jenner’s response to the egg is also quite funny.

It’s nice to see something so wholesome reigning supreme on the internet (and not taking anything away from Kylie and her baby). Nothing divisive, nothing with any kind of preconceived notion attached to it- just an egg.

With 52 million likes. You can add more by clicking HERE and liking the image.

In something you may not have seen this weekend but definitely something I saw on Reddit, here’s a video of a helicopter rescuing a climber while masterfully getting close to a snowy mountain and managing to not kill himself or the climber.

Placement.

For 2019, I’m going to introduce some new segments!

The first of which is our...

​Meet Nick Sandmann.

He’s a junior at Covington Catholic High School in Kentucky.

He’s also this asshole, who can be seen in a viral news video smugly facing off with a Native American elder during the Indigenous Peoples March at the Lincoln Memorial.

You know. That kid in the Make America Great Again hat.

As the elder beats a drum, Sandmann simply smiles at him with this pompous grin on his face, as other teenagers laugh, jump around and seemingly mock the actions of the Native American marchers.

Having been not so popular in high school, I have seen this look before. It’s been directed at me. It frustrated and flustered me to no end. To be met with disingenuous and patronizing smiles and mocking faces from bullies while I was just trying to live my life.

The main thing about this smile is that it not only comes off as menacing; it is menacing. It’s meant to be mocking and, in the case of the hat and everything the MAGA hat-wearers stand for, it’s meant to be imposing on those who aren’t like the young white men wearing the hat.

Sandmann submitted a statement to CNN saying he was trying to diffuse the situation, citing his faith “taught [him]... to be respectful of others, and to take no action that would lead to conflict or violence.”

How about just flat out staying away from the marches then, huh, boss? Instead of shoving your smackable face on television for the world to pick you apart?

Sandmann went on to urge people to watch longer versions of the clip online, saying that “they show a much different story than is being portrayed people with agendas.”

Gag me.

Nathan Phillips, a Vietnam war veteran who is the man beating the drum in the video, said he did not feel safe inside the circle of teenagers that had formed at the Lincoln Memorial. He began to play his drum and chanting what supposedly was a healing prayer in order to ease the situation.

According to those at the march and around the circle, the feeling was described as “tense,” and that chants of “Build the wall” and “Trump 2020” were heard in the shuffle.

Sandmann went on to say that he was confused as to why Phillips was in his face, even going so far to say that the protesters were trying to “provoke teenagers.”

Give me a break. Not a single person feels bad for you, you scum.

The fact that the Roman Catholic Diocese of Covington has made moves to investigate the actions of the teenagers means that there was probably intent to intimidate or bully the Native American protesters.

For all the entitlement that conservatives and Republican politicians claim occurs on the liberal or Democrat side, they are not without fault themselves. When people call them out on their shit, they backtrack and deny anything happened.

A tip: the television footage of some snot nosed Catholic school bro giving the “I have all the power” smile to a Native American protester looks TERRIBLE.

This asshole looks like he’s proud of what he’s doing. And I want to slap the privilege right off his smug little face.

I’m so mad I can hardly put words together. Except for "Nick Sandmann is our Douchebag of the Month!"

And finally, the best thing I saw this month.
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This is a commercial that Gillette released midway through the month.

The razor company’s slogan is “The Best a Man Can Get,” but even challenges men to be better men. To call out other men whose masculinity can be seen as toxic.
If you’re a man, did this commercial make you angry?

Good. That was the point.

Can’t deal with people calling you out on your shit? Good. Maybe you shouldn’t try to pull your shit and be a better fucking person.

There is nothing wrong with going to the bar with the boys and having a beer or playing pool or watching football or WHATEVER.

Bullying. Street harassment. Domestic violence. The idea that “boys will be boys.” Why haven’t we learned to be better people?

My favorite argument is probably the “not all men” argument. Because it’s the men who say “not all men” that make themselves look like the assholes- they look defensive and they look, honestly, weak.

You can view this ad as a generalization against men and an attack on masculinity, but if you really believe that it’s “not all men,” if it’s not you, why not help the men that ARE to blame here?

Nobody is perfect. We can ALL afford to be better people. And if that makes you angry, maybe, just like when you shave, you need to take a good look in the mirror.

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I’m really sorry I took so long to get this up, you guys. It’s been a rough last few weeks for me- I’m in the middle of moving and working multiple jobs at all hours of the day. But I didn’t forget and I’m really happy you’re all still here and reading.

Please be good to each other.

And stay warm.

Happy February!

Andrew

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Theatre is expensive. I also work every single day. It’s not as possible for me to see good theatre as I would like. But still, there was some great theatre in 2018 that I saw.

So, these are the shows I saw in 2018, ranked in countdown form. Some of them were good, some of them were bad. I don’t get to see many shows while I’m working, so give me a break.

I am fully aware that I still have to see shows like To Kill a Mockingbird and Network.

For criteria, the show had to be playing in 2018, and I had to see it. It’s fairly simple.

So let’s get to it.

According to Andrew, these are the best plays and musicals (that I saw) in 2018.

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Leave it to King John to impress me with everything he does. I seriously had no idea what to expect when I walked in to see Stories by Heart. When I walked out I realized how dumb I was- I was watching Lithgow recite and perform stories he had learned… by heart.

The one-man show is mesmerizing. Lithgow’s voices and extremely specific pantomime show just how talented his is as an actor. I couldn’t mime shaving a guy and consistently be able to go back to the same exact spot every time to take a razor to the invisible guy’s face.

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I feel like now that this show is out of my theatre I can finally give it the recognition it deserves.

I saw three really bad shows in 2018 and this was one of them. What made it worse was that I had to watch terrible dialogue being performed by irrelevant actors 8 times per week.

The phrase “House hunting” with a peculiar questioning inflection at the end will be forever burned into my mind.

Thanks to the cast for this. Don’t send me any Christmas Cards.

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Gettin' the Band Back Together

This one was nominated for Best Play at the Tony Awards. Why?

I think this was the one play I didn’t understand at all. What was the relationship between the three actors? Where were they? What was the overarching world throughout the piece? And why were they constantly talking about children as if it seemingly had nothing do with them.

All of these questions and more were not answered at all in The Children.

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I have never seen Mark Rylance live onstage before. Now that I have, I totally understand what everyone was talking about.

Farinelli is a fascinating play about music therapy, told through the tale of King Philip V and his countertenor counterpart, Farinelli. The play, directed by Claire Van Kampen, is done entirely by candlelight (sort of), with full staging as if performed at Shakespeare’s Globe theatre. Rylance and Sam Crane (Farinelli) gave incredible performances, and this made Farinelli and the King one of the most underrated places of theatre of 2018.

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5. Head Over Heels

I will never forget how the end of this play made me feel. What I felt was a combination of anger, fear, shock, and sadness. I was shaking with many different emotions, reaching a new level of friendship with my friend Gabby as we clung to each other as the lights faded.

Since this play is still on Broadway, I won’t tell you what happens. Just know a few things: It’s long, the accents are thick, and this play should win every single Tony Award it’s nominated for.

The Ferryman is absolutely brilliant, and I’m so happy that people are flocking to see this play.

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1. Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

Somehow, I scored tickets to this show while it was still in previews. $150 for both parts. Not a bad deal for 3rd row balcony with a booster seat.

The play is bad fan fiction. I’m not going to lie, it’s bad fan fiction.

Still, the play is THAT GOOD. The effects. The actors making choices that make even the most cringe-worthy lines seem real, emotional, and dramatic. The costumes and the music. It’s all excellent.

I’m not a Harry Potter fanatic by any stretch of the imagination, but this play touched something in me that not many other plays this year have. It is excellent.

Also, shoutout to my friend and co-worker Sarita for booking a part in this magical production!

Harry Potter earns my top spot as the best theatrical experience I was apart of this year.

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What plays and musical did you see that were your favorites in 2018? Leave a comment down below. 

Be sure to check out the rest of According to Andrew's Best of 2018 spread by clicking ​HERE.

The second is more recent, and that’s Stephen Hillenburg, the creator of Spongebob Squarepants, who passed at the age of 57 only a few days before writing. He had been diagnosed with ALS a year and a half prior.

Hillenburg, I would say, was way below the radar in comparison to Lee, whereas many fans of Spongebob are more familiar with the character and his voice (Tom Kenny) instead of the creator of the show. The target audience is kids, who tend to care less about things like that. But for those of us who grew up watching Spongebob on TV, this loss is devastating.

Spongebob is probably Nickelodeon’s most successful and well-known animated show. It’s been on the air since 1999. Next year will be the show’s 13th season and 20th year on the air.

And sure, most of the successes of the show came in the first three seasons, when Hillenburg was showrunner, but that doesn’t make the lasting impact of Spongebob any less great.

The franchise spawned two movies (with another on the way in 2020), theme parks, video games, and one kickass Broadway musical.

Spongebob is legendary. He is transcendent. And because Hillenburg flew “under the radar” as a face of modern pop culture, he was able to create and develop this wonderful creation and give this gift to the world. He’s a hero as well.

Mr. Hillenburg, thank you. ​
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Here's to two legends who helped shape and define our childhoods. 
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So, if you live under a rock, there’s a romaine lettuce recall in the United States due to an E. Coli outbreak, carried on lettuce from Yuma, Arizona.

210 people from 36 states have claimed illness due to the bacteria, the first cases of illness coming from New York.

Thousands of food carriers, from super markets to restaurants, have thrown out their romaine lettuce in favor of other greens.
​​

I can’t tell if my podcast partner Kata just hates lettuce or if she is genuinely concerned for my safety.

And it’s because she used the phrase “the lettuce is broken” that I decided to include a quick thing about it on the Wrap Sheet.

Also, you can check out the latest episode of Under Further Review HERE or by searching for us on Apple Podcasts.

Panera Bread (the same one that has wronged me, on 39th and 5th) has started using mixed greens for their lettuce substitute.

My local deli has (I believe) also done the same.

What’s funny to me (and not to quote a meme or anything) is that people will say romaine lettuce is bad and MILLIONS of people will throw it out without question. But thousands, maybe millions of people have been murdered by guns and people won’t do anything about those.

Just me? I don’t know. I’m typing this at 9:30 in the morning and the red bull didn’t take to my system so I could just be in a mood.
​

And that about does it for me, y’all.

This is the last Wrap Sheet of 2018! In December I have a lot of lists I’m trying to put out, all leading up to my Best of 2018 spread. This will be leading into the fourth year of the blog, and I’m real excited to share more of my work with you guys.

Thanks to everyone for reading along with my incoherent ramblings for the last couple of years. Here’s to many more.

Be good out there.

Andrew

​

It’s a tough month, September.

The start of fall means many things. The summer is over. School’s back in session; kids are leaving home for the first time to venture into the unknown that is college. Or maybe they’re even younger than that and are venturing into the cruel unknown that is high school or middle school. And that can mean different things for parents, too.

The temperatures are getting colder. I know here in New York it’s been nice and cool and (as of the day of my writing this) even cloudy and rainy of late.

And, obviously, allergies are a thing. Take your Claritin, kids.

And then there’s all the shit that’s been happening in this country, and it’s almost like the world is falling to hell.

You’ll have to bear with me, as this is probably going to be a very scattered version of the Wrap Sheet.

I have been largely silent on the subject of Judge Brett Kavanaugh, and his hearing that has been going on in the last few days, as well as the statements of Dr. Christine Blasey Ford. I have been away from social media, just because reading about it all makes me upset and spikey.

My thoughts are brief.

Brett Kavanaugh is a spineless piece of shit. I love the analogy of Hillary Clinton being question for 11 hours and not batting an eyelash, but Kavanaugh being questioned for 11 minutes and breaking down into hysterical sobs and outrage.

And yet, a part of me felt that all the outrage meant (or rather, would amount to) nothing, because the politicians in this country care about politics and party over people.

When I saw this morning that the swing Republican voter, Jeff Flake, would vote in favor of appointing Kavanaugh, I thought to myself that it did not come as a surprise. Politics over people.

Right before I started writing, I saw that the vote would be pushed back a week to “allow for FBI investigation,” which gave me back a fraction of my faith in humanity.
I guess I didn’t know what to say about this whole thing.

I know that as a straight white man, and even as a human who has made mistakes in this life, it is my job to be a better person in any way that I can. Little steps, big steps, whatever.

We all have to be better.

And it’s sad that we, in 2018, aren’t already.

I want to move off this issue, if that’s okay with you guys.

The weather and politics have me in a funk today, and for the rest of the time, I want to share with you a few things from September that made me laugh, smile, or just make me feel good.

Because for all the utter shit that this fall has brought us this far, there are some diamonds that lie in the rough.

Let’s jump into it. For real this time.

EDIT: Somebody made THIS and I think it’s incredible.

This is the Kavanaugh hearing combined with some Pulp Fiction. ​

"Check out the big brain on Brett!"

​This just brings me pure joy.

​If I go chronologically from my notes, one of the first things that happened this month was a Nike commercial that aired during the opening game of the NFL season.

As you can imagine, there was backlash.

But here’s the thing. Nobody cares what you think. This is the age of the internet where you’re just a faceless nobody behind a computer screen.

This commercial is fantastic. And I’m not getting anything from this commercial other than “chase your dreams, no matter the obstacle.”

But of course, the internet went apeshit at it. And people started burning Nike gear on their front lawns. Because, y’know. People are crazy.

​To which Nike responded with this tweet:​

Just sweet. So, so sweet.

There will probably be no smooth segways in this Wrap Sheet, just because it’s how I’m feeling today, and I wanted to share all of these things with you.

Husband calling became a thing this month.

Only in Iowa, am I right?

I have a stepfather who is, for lack of a better term, a bit of a bellower.

It’s charming, really, I promise it is.

But he ain’t got nothing on these midwestern ladies, especially the very last woman in the video, who placed first in the 2017 competition, 89-year old Bonnie Swalwell Eilert. She’s the stern grandma you read about personified into a real-life Iowan husband caller.

The bite in her voice when she says “Can you hear me?” is FANTASTIC.

I want to tie back to politics really quickly, but it’s about Barack Obama, so I hope you’ll give it a pass.

Obama broke with tradition by going out on the campaign trail and publicly calling out the current president during an event at the University of Illinois.

You can watch some of the highlights here:

I miss this man. His speech is measured, eloquent, and well-informed. Also his voice is just plain old pleasing to listen to. I can’t even bring myself to listen to Trump talk because his voice is just as decrepit as he is. Watching Obama speak, especially when Trump is president, is cathartic. You can, like, take a deep breath, almost.

Brie Larson is playing Captain Marvel in the upcoming film of the same name, so that’s fun.

And, of course, she’s already facing the ire of cowardly men on the internet who think she doesn’t smile enough in the first trailer released for the film.

Also, don’t tell women to smile. I don’t care what your intentions are.

“Hey, smile.”

“Life’s not that bad!”

“You’d look prettier if you smiled.”
​
I don’t care. Stop it. She’ll smile if she wants to, not for your enjoyment.

That being said, Larson took to Instagram to post these pictures in response to the “smile more” comments:

​Brie Larson with the clapback of the year.

If you’re a superhero, you probably aren’t smiling when you’re protecting the world from evil or an alien invasion.

And if you expect them to be smiling while they do it, they probably look as goofy and as unsettling as the men in the reimagined posters that Larson posted.

Keep on keepin’ on, Brie Larson.

Captain Marvel comes out March 8th, 2019. I’m excited.

We’ll finish with a few sports things, because sports make me happy and this is my blog so shut up.

The first is Tiger Woods, who finally won his first golf tournament in five years, going wire to wire to win the Tour Championship last Sunday by five strokes.

Justin Rose actually won the FedEx cup, as the Tour Championship is the final event in golf’s playoffs, but Woods took home the victory for the actual tournament.

What struck me were the THRONGS of people who took to the course to watch Tiger win his first tournament since 2013.

Seriously, look at these pictures:

Regardless of what you think of Tiger Woods, there is no doubt this man made golf cool when he was in his prime.

How often do you see a crowd of people of this size following Rory McIlroy or Justin Thomas?

Tiger makes golf worth watching. And if you’re a casual golfer who doesn’t actively watch it on TV, you’ll watch if Tiger is in contention on Sunday.

This is one of the great sports stories of the year, and it will be a major talking point in 2019 if Tiger can continue his upward trend.

I never thought the golf shot of the year would be a two-foot, tap-in putt on the final PGA tournament of the year.

Welcome back, Tiger.

And finally, the best thing I saw this month:

The Philadelphia Flyers have a new mascot.

He was born in the space between fantasy and reality, initially thrown out as an idea character for the film The Happytime Murders.

He was the love child of the Phillie Phanatic and Danny DeVito’s character from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

He is an acid trip, perfectly reflective of Philadelphia’s sports teams and its collective culture.

He has broken the internet.

This is Gritty.

​And just in time for Halloween, because this piece of genius is utterly terrifying.

He’s a coked-out, googly-eyed menace. And he’s coming to fuck shit up on the ice this winter.
​

​Oh, by the way. When I say he’s broken the internet, I’m not kidding.

​Here he is recreating a famous photo:
​

Here he is dancing (sorta) with Jimmy Fallon and Ricky Gervais:

Gritty is a national treasure who looks like he’s going to send kids six packs of Yuengling for Christmas.

He’s a beautiful mess that perfectly encapsulates Philadelphia, existing solely to remind the world that this is the city that booed and threw snowballs at Santa Claus, greased its light poles to minimize riot damage from its first Super Bowl win, had man intentionally throw up on a police officer AND HIS 11-YEAR OLD DAUGHTER, and had Sylvester Stallone run up the stairs of the Philadelphia Museum of Art ONE TIME.

Gritty is the best because he is the worst. And I can’t wait to see what comes next out of this orange nightmare fuel.

Give me more Gritty, NHL. WE WANT MORE GRITTY.
​

So, yeah. For everything that’s happened this month, there’s been some equally great things that are overshadowed by the depressing news.

And that concludes this month’s Wrap Sheet, you guys.

I have a new sports vodcast called Under Further Review, where my partner, Kata Stevens and I give our tepid opinions on sports and things. We broadcast on Facebook Live every Monday, with a podcast version put out later in the afternoon.

We also drink and do fun dares and stuff. This Monday, one of us is getting pelted with water balloons by random passersby.

You can find us our pages on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter using the handle @ufrvodcast.

Lots of fun things coming up this fall, you guys! October means baseball playoff predictions, plus a first look into Oscar season.

I’ve also got my Best of 2018 spread in its early planning stages, so look forward to that.

Thanks for reading. Stay alert out there.

​

It has not been a good last few months for the movies-for-less subscription service. After initially running out of money and taking out a $5 million loan, Moviepass rolled out its first slew of changes in early July. These changes included:

• A price increase from $9.95/month to $15/month.
• Blackouts on popular films like Mission Impossible: Fallout (instead of upping the prices of popular movies with peak pricing), while also continuing surge pricing on major releases.
• Limiting subscribers to three movies per month, and not allowing subscribers to use Moviepass to see a given movie more than once.

This past month, Moviepass made some changes to its rules once again, reinstating the $9.95/month plan, but keeping the limit to three movies per month (a decision they’ve made based on the data that most subscribers see an average of three movies per month), and eliminating surge pricing altogether.

In what is being called a “transition period,” Moviepass is still blacking out popular films and showtimes, limiting subscribers to two movies per month for the time being.

In its newest set of changes, the service will release a set of films (six films set to rotate periodically) and screening times on a new daily schedule updated each day, seemingly making going to the movies into a guessing game, forcing its subscribers to chance both the schedule and the clock in order to see a film.

Given that you have to be within a certain distance of a movie theatre to purchase a ticket with the app and card, having to dance around the schedule Moviepass sets for its films is going to be difficult.

Another change came in regards to seeing more than three films per month. If a subscriber sees more than the allotted three, each additional movie will have a $2-$5 discount, billed to the account associated with the user’s card.

And like I initially thought, that doesn’t mean each subsequent movie will be $2 to $5. That means you’ll pay for the full-priced ticket, and Moviepass will knock off anywhere from $2-$5, depending on the film.

Spoiler alert: It is that problematic.

It’s not really a great message to be sending to teens who may be insecure in their own bodies, that this is what you need to do in order to be considered pretty.
Also, it’s just bad writing with unlikeable characters.

I think I may have heard the phrase “but I wanted my revenge” from Patty at least ten times in the pilot alone. I can’t. I don’t care.

NPR’s Linda Holmes gave this show a ​ scathing review:

“Let me assure you: It is not satire. Insatiable is satire in the same way someone who screams profanities out a car window is a spoken-word poet. Satire requires a point of view; this has none. It generally requires some feel for humor, however dark; this has none. It requires a mastery of tone; this has none. It requires a sense that the actors are all part of the same project; this has none.”

I’d agree, especially with the last point. Bob (Dallas Roberts) and Patty have zero on screen chemistry. It also doesn’t help that he’s old enough to be her father, and she’s pining over him. The faux-relationship is fuzzy and it make me feel like I need to take a shower.

The characters are nothing more than grossly broad stereotypes, and the social commentary reeks of feigned wokeness. This is probably Netflix’s worst show so far.

​

On paper, it was just another month for the White House.

But of course, for this White House, another month is always the opposite of “just another month.”

Paul Manafort and Michael Cohen, two former associates of Donald Trump, were arrested and indicted in the last few weeks of the month.

Manafort served as chairman of the Trump campaign from June until August 2016. Some of his past work was the subject of controversy, as he participated in meetings with pro-Russian Ukrainian businessmen, one such meeting took place at Trump tower for the purpose of delivering “dirt” on Hillary Clinton’s campaign.

Manafort was indicted in October on counts of tax evasion, money laundering, failing to identify as a foreign official, and making false statements to investigators.

He faces up to 80 years in prison.

Cohen, who served as Trump’s personal lawyer from 2006 until his firing in May, plead guilty to eight felony charges ranging from tax evasion, to lying to banks in order to obtain loans, to making illegal contributions to the Trump campaign, and even to two counts of violating campaign finance laws in order to pay off women who claimed to have affairs with Trump.

Cohen implicated the President in his plea, saying he made his payments “at the discretion of the candidate” for the purposes of influencing the election.

So this is fun.

I try not to waste too much of my time being shocked at the fact that the Trump administration is corrupt. I believe what I read in the news, and I can only say that I’m shocked that news actually broke.

What I’m not so surprised by has been the President’s assessment of the situation.

“Doesn’t involve me,” he muttered in an interview, attempting to distance himself from his former lawyer. He later tweeted about Cohen, advising people to not “retain the services of Michael Cohen” if they’re looking for a “good lawyer.”

I’m also not as surprised by Trump’s base reacting by still believing the President is not corrupt.

But I think they know something’s up, and they’re trying to save face by looking tough behind a computer screen in the face of danger.

I’m not going to jump to conclusions and say that Trump should be ready for impeachment because I believe the machine he has created is stubborn and will not allow him to leave office under someone else’s power, if it can be helped.

But god, if this isn’t reason to vote in November, I don’t know what is.

Somebody humble this asshole, and quick.

​

Manziel’s first pass was a five yard loss. His second pass was intercepted. By halftime, he had thrown four interceptions. He was 11/24 for 104 yards.

Johnny Football’s fall from grace has been astounding to watch. He was too willing to get out of college, but probably could have benefitted from a few more years’ play (and probably a few more years’ maturity).

He’s just coming back from injury after two weeks away, so we’ll see what happens in the next chapter of Mr. Manziel.

Presently, the Alouettes sit at 2-8, at the bottom of the CFL standings.

Football’s hard.

​

Something about these people flying from above like missiles (and the best is when it’s two or three at a time) is beautiful to me.

And, of course, the divers hitting the water makes me die laughing every time.

This has been your August Wrap Sheet! Leave a comment down below if there's anything you think I missed, or if you have any suggestions for future posts!

​
Also, some other media news I promised earlier...

I’m working on a new vodcast called Under Further Review, and our first episode just went live on Facebook a few days ago!

Join me and Kata Stevens as we explore the world of sports and drink while we’re doing it.

Click HERE to join in on the fun, and make sure to follow us on Twitter and Instagram using the handle @ufrvodcast.
​

July, 2018

Apologies for the late posting (I know, it’s August 2nd). But let’s talk about July!

I have a lot to get to this week, including some major sports news, a film review, opinions on Twitter, theatre, and a new segment I’m calling the Best Thing I Saw This Month.

Let’s muse.

I want to get sports out of the way first. The big story didn’t really feel like a big story because we all knew it was coming- LeBron James is now a member of the Los Angeles Lakers. He signed a 4-year, $153.3 million contract earlier in the month.

My hot take is that this doesn’t make the Lakers championship contenders. I mean, obviously it does, any team with LeBron on it is a contender, but it doesn’t make them automatic championship contenders. In fact, I think LeBron made it harder on himself by going to the Western Conference, especially since the Warriors just brought in DeMarcus Cousins to add to their superteam.

As it stands, LeBron is surrounded by an underwhelming but somewhat-decent cast including Rajon Rondo, Kyle Kuzma, JaVale McGee, and Brandon Ingram, with players like Lonzo Ball, Lance Stephenson, and Kentavious Caldwell-Pope coming off the bench. I don’t know about you, but I’m not scared of that team if I’m the Warriors, Rockets, or Celtics.

The West is going to be a bloodbath this season.
​

In soccer, France defeated Croatia, 4-2, in the most boring World Cup Final pairing of all time.

In golf, Tiger Woods made a run at the British open after being fairly mediocre through the first two rounds, eventually holding an outright lead on the front nine of his final round. Unfortunately, Woods couldn't hold the lead for long. The 14-time major champion finished three strokes back of eventual winner, Italian Francesco Molinari, who became the first of his countryman to win a major championship.

What really struck me, though, was Rory McIlroy's beautiful double-fist-pump-pirouette combo after sinking a long eagle putt on #14 to put him within a stroke of the leaders.

Donald Trump, after meeting with Vladimir Putin at a summit in Helsinki, said that he didn’t “see any reason why it would be Russia” interfering with this country’s elections, causing major internet backlash.

Trump sided with Russia. What else is new?

What I want to talk about is the backlash and eventual revision of the statement. In a press conference a few days later, facing fury from both his supporters and opposers, said that he misspoke.

“I thought it would be obvious,” he told the press, “but I would like to clarify just in case it wasn’t (it wasn’t, hence the backlash). In a key sentence in my remarks, I said the word ‘would’ instead of ‘wouldn’t’... The sentence should have been: ‘I don’t see any reason why I wouldn’t, or why it wouldn’t be Russia.’ Sort of a double negative. So you can put that in, and I think that probably clarifies things pretty good by itself.”

Obviously it didn’t clarify things pretty good by themselves. The comment sparked the hashtags #would and #wouldnt trended worldwide on twitter.

But Trump very clearly being an idiot again is not what I want to discuss.

I’m sorry if this seems to “normalize” Trump’s behavior, but I think we need to stop being shocked at what he does or doesn’t do that is defined as “normal,” and look forward to the next voting cycle so that we can put an end to this buffoonery.

This story brings me to my main point: Twitter.

Twitter and I have a love-hate relationship. I use it to get a lot of my breaking news from journalists I follow. It’s very convenient to have all of my news in the same place divided not by media outlet, but by primary source. It’s also a convenient place for me to find memes and other funny things to retweet so I can convince my followers that I have a sense of humor.

It also pisses me the hell off sometimes; so much utter shit goes through that universe that it makes me want to pull the plug on social media altogether. There’s just so many opinions on Twitter that I do. Not. Care. About.

One such issue I take with Twitter is that of a potential “edit tweet” option. And I totally get understand its appeal to the mass-users, the “casual tweeters.”

You spend a few minutes crafting a tweet. Maybe it’s over the 280 character mark. Maybe you’re looking for just the right wording. And you send it, and it gets a bunch of likes and retweets, but you notice -gasp- it’s got a typo. Maybe even a few typos. But you’ve already worked so hard to get those likes! And since there’s no editing option, you’re forced to delete the tweet, type it again, and resend it, and you look like an idiot to your friends because you’re double posting, and the same people probably won’t like/retweet it again because they did the first time and I GET THE APPEAL OKAY.

My opinion on the edit button is that there shouldn’t be one. That’s the beauty of Twitter- it’s very stream-of-consciousness, at least for most of us who don’t use twitter to break news. I say leave the edit button to Facebook and Instagram. Also, if you can’t take two seconds re-read a tweet for typos, you don’t deserve an “edit tweet” button.

Also, consider the following, if you want to get technical about it: a certain politician tweets something nice and considerate. It receives a million likes and a million retweets.

And then that certain politician uses the “edit tweet” function to make that tweet really racist or homophobic or xenophobic, and it looks like those million people who liked and retweeted actually liked and retweeted a really awful tweet.

Hold people accountable for their actions and don’t even think about adding an “edit tweet” option.

Also, learn to spell check your own work.

I only saw one movie in July, and that was Bo Burnham’s coming of age comedy, Eighth Grade.

Jesus, was this movie a hot mess.

And by "hot mess," I mean the life of Kayla (played by Elsie Fisher, a shy, awkward thirteen-year-old who struggles to figure out what it means to be popular, pretty, social, and above all, herself, as she navigates the murky waters of her final week of middle school.

(Because I can’t do movie reviews that aren’t spoiler-free, there are mild spoilers ahead.)

Anyone who has been through the actual eighth grade in the last two decades knows what Kayla has been through: the terror of attending school, the anxiety of trying to impress the cool kids, and the pressure of living up to the expectations of parents. Eighth Grade makes you take a long, cringey trip down memory lane, while all the while making you look your own awkward experiences in the face.

Kayla’s father Mark (Josh Hamilton) plays a loving parent who wants nothing more than to show his daughter love and support as she grows older. His monologue toward the end about taking pride in being a parent and how he wants the same for Kayla is soul-stirring.

But where Eighth Grade took a turn for me was its setting. It’s set in the present, and middle school in 2018 is very different from middle school in 2008.

What the kids in Eighth Grade have that I never had at that age were smartphones and easy internet access. Kayla makes and shares advice videos on YouTube, the other kids in the movie navigate Instagram and Snapchat with relative ease. There’s also the added pressure of sexual discovery that is briefly touched upon in the film, but Burnham refrains from going too over the top on that front. It’s perfectly cringey and illustrates 2000s teenage insecurity perfectly. It’s deliciously agonizing to watch Kayla’s every move.

Navigating this current world is hard enough (and I say that now, as a twentysomething living on his own in New York), but I can’t even imagine doing it when you’re newly thirteen. Eighth Grade knocks it out of the park. Depending on the competition, Bo Burnham could find himself at the Oscars with a screenwriting nomination next year.
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17 years ago, a show featuring the music of ABBA opened up on Broadway to mixed reviews. That show was Mamma Mia!. It won a grand total of zero Tony Awards after being nominated for only five. But it ran for 14 years, spawned various national tours, and had two movie spin-offs. Anything can happen to a show if enough people give it a chance and see it.

I work as an usher on Broadway for the show Head Over Heels, which just opened last Thursday to, let’s be less, less than stellar reviews. You can read one of those reviews here.

Head Over Heels is based on Sir Philip Sidney’s poem The Countess of Pembroke’s Arcadia, set to the music of the popular revolutionary 80’s band The Go-Go’s. It’s a bizarre combination of heightened english text and mainstream pop music that blends together really well. It’s also the gayest thing I’ve ever had the pleasure to see and I’m so here for it.

But the show got bashed over the head by reviews. Now, ticket sales have been relatively steady and I don’t know how much of that has to do with the fact that the show is now finally open or the controversy surrounding New York Times reporter Ben Brantley, who intentionally misgendered the show’s transgender star, Peppermint, as a joke during his review (Peppermint is the first transgender woman to originate a principal role on Broadway) and his subsequent apology.

The jukebox musical has run its course on Broadway, I’d say. Ever since Jersey Boys reached the top of the mountain, you don’t see too many reaching that same fanfare. That’s not to say they’re not popular, because we’ve had a plethora of them reach Broadway since 2000- they are recognizable commodities, after all- but as far as critical reception, I feel like folks are generally tired of their existence and prevalence over more original works.

The thing with Head Over Heels is that it doesn’t feel like a jukebox musical, at least not to this particular millennial. Perhaps it’s because I was not ultra-familiar with the Go-Go’s canon before seeing the show, and thus many of the songs feel fresh to me (thanks to the brilliant work of orchestrator Tom Kitt), not to mention the lyrics lend themselves to the book, which I think is the strength of the piece.

Working in show business, so often do I hear “oh, I heard it didn’t get very good reviews,” which is basically the same thing as saying “someone else I don’t know said it’s not worth my time, so I’m not going to give it a try.”

This is less of an opinion piece and more of a public service announcement. The only person who can decide if something is for you is YOU. Not a reviewer, not the internet, not your friend or family member- you.

I stress this every year- don’t let reviews or the number of Tony Awards a show wins dictate what you see in New York. Some musicals make you think- there’s nothing wrong with that. Some musicals make you smile and laugh until your face hurts, and that’s their only purpose- there’s nothing wrong with that either. I am sick and tired of people going to see award-winning shows for the sake of seeming cultured or bragging to their friends that they got to see their favorite movie star in a garbage play. Alas, this is the nature of commercial theatre- marketing and selling tickets in any way a show can. Perhaps Head Over Heels hasn’t done the best possible job at that, but in my attempt to sway the populace away from the norm and into the unknown: give the show a chance. Theatre is entertainment, and that’s what this show brings to the table. Its message is also timeless- Love and acceptance and equal representation for all. What’s not to love?

​

This last section is the best thing I saw this month, and it revolves around the Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest, which took place at Coney Island on July 4th. I had the pleasure of being there this year (although it is something I will probably never do again), and I was introduced first hand to one particular individual who will live forever in my memory.

And no, I’m not talking about any of the eaters. I was there- there’s no way in hell Joey Chestnut ate 74 hotdogs and buns in 10 minutes due to a "massive judging error." 

No, the real hero of the day was a man by the name of George Shea. He's this guy, who does all the announcing for the event. The guy who wears the hat that says to everyone he's a guy running for mayor in a small town in Missouri (pronounced mizz-UR-uh, not mizz-UR-ee).

George Shea.

Shea was an aspiring writer who studied literature at Columbia, but later found himself managing a PR firm along with his brother Richard, the same firm that handled the Nathan’s account. Together, the two took the hot dog eating contest from a sideshow event and turned it into an international phenomenon watched by millions of people on national television every independence day.

In 1997, the brothers founded the International Federation for Competitive Eating, later renamed Major League Eating, and began to hold eating competitions around the world (and yes, there are videos of people shoving not just hot dogs, but everything from pork rolls, to oysters, to raw onions down their gullets in an allotted time). Thanks to the success of breakout stars like Takeru Kobayashi and Joey Chestnut (and the two’s back-and-forth rivalry), the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest has become an event that is far removed from a vaudeville event.

With George Shea at the helm as emcee, he has elevated it from a sideshow attraction to a place on the pedestal at God’s right hand.

Shea has a knack for introducing the colorful competitors with such incredibly outlandish fervor, that he has turned himself into a national treasure. He has the ability to dance upon the razor-sharp edge between a joke and a very real emotional event. These introductions are absurd, verbose, elaborate, ironic, and uniquely inspiring, packed with esoteric references and grandiose language. He delivers his speeches with a charismatic energy that it rivals (and, more often than not, surpasses) the heart of most sports commentators.

For example:

Of current champion Joey Chestnut:
​
“He has God’s username and password and does with it what he pleases!”

And also, because this is too good to pass up:

“He is the citadel, and he shall endure forever, because he is freedom. And he will fight until the dome of heaven collapses, and the black avalanche of space pours down around him.”

In 2014, Chestnut was carried to the stage on a mustard yellow palanquin, which prompted this epic speech from Shea, accompanied by The Who's "Baba O'Reilly." ("Out heeeere in the fields, I fight for my mealllllls")

​

​Of former women’s champion Sonya “The Black Widow” Thomas:

​“She is the shadow under the lotus petal. She is the absence of beauty. She is the memory of pain more painful than the pain itself. She is the darkness driven ever westward by the rising sun."

Of former competitor Yasir Salem:
​“He is entirely committed to competitive eating. He will do whatever it takes to win. Three days ago he broke up with his girlfriend and euthanized his dog to leave a void of emptiness inside him that he could fill today with hot dogs and buns.”

Of Rich “The Locust” Lefevre, the 73-year old competitive eater:
​“When we’re young we drink our coffee with milk and sugar, and as we age we drink it with milk only, and then we drink it black, and then we drink it decaf, then we die. Our next eater is at decaf.”

Of eater Pablo Martinez:
​“His marriage troubles began when he named his children Mild, Medium, and Hot. But he will not let domestic issues get in the way of the task at hand."

Two for former competitor Tim “Eater X” Janus:

​“His lost his arm to a Bengal tiger in a boyhood trip to the Atlanta zoo. But his arm grew back. He can speak Neutrino, the language of the sun, and all day long he listens to the conversations in the sky.”

And:

“He was born outside of time. A witness to all possible realities. He was there when the sea and the sky were mixed together as one and humans floated from the depths of the Pacific to the very edge of space where they looked out at the stars in the blackness. He was there when druids walked the earth, and he watched as mankind built great cities, developed technology, and invented complex language with combination words such as bromance, labradoodle, manscaping, frenemy and craptacular.”

And finally, there is Eric “Badlands” Booker, who is also a self-producing rapper. During the 2018 event, Badlands performed three rap songs, and then went on to eat a respectable 20 hot dogs and buns. But no performance was more epic than when Shea and Booker tag teamed his entrance. Eat your heart out, Hamilton. ​

George Shea. A living legend if there ever was one. You’re my hero, and the best thing I saw this month.

That about does it for this month's wrap sheet. Keep a lookout for lots more coming this August from the blog, including my yearly NFL preview!

I'm going to try a little something new starting today.

I have come to the realization that most blogs are opinion-based. And while top ten lists and others are fun, they're not the only thing. I find that much of the feedback I receive comes from my opinion-based pieces.

Thanks to an idea from a friend of mine, a new segment- The Wrap Sheet- is born.

This is basically "Andrew Airs His Grievances," where I take a look at some of the events that happened in a given month and give opinions about them. You might find some of this fun to read, and it might even encourage some fun constructive debate.

The Wrap Sheet will be a monthly thing, and since June was super eventful, I figured this was a good place to start.

Again, I want to thank everyone who's been reading this blog over the last three and a half years.

Let's wrap up the month of June, now, shall we?
​

​This month was a wild one, wasn’t it? I guess after that prolonged winter, June decided it really was time to bust out all over.

So let’s hucka those bejeepers and dive right into it.

If you’re not sure what I’m referring to by that, I’ll let Leslie Uggams explain.

Did you know she’s the old woman in Deadpool??? I sure didn’t.

There’s a lot to cover this month, and I’ll try to keep it as organized by category as I possibly can.

My featured story this month stems from the magical (or, rather not-so-magical-anymore) world of pancakes.

​... I mean burgers.

IHOP, the beloved International House of Pancakes, went ahead and changed its damn name. Henceforth, the restaurant will be known as IHOb, otherwise known as the International House of Blasphemy.

I mean, the International House of Burgers.

My problem with this is, well, everything.

And I believe the root of the problem, and ultimately the demise of the P, comes from the removal of the beloved Cinn-A-Stack pancakes from the IHOP menu.
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These half-pastry, half-pancake bundles of joy were what kept me coming back time and time again. Hell, for national pancake day, I would STILL pay the $8.99 (or whatever it was) for an extra plate of these majestic creatures.

And then they were taken off the menu, and my lust for IHOP began to gradually die a little every day.

There was talk of the Cinn-A-Stacks being a secret menu item, allowing patrons to order them for a limited time until they were taken off the menu for good. When eating at the IHOP off I-90 in Newton on a fall morning some time in late 2016 (or maybe it was even before that. But it definitely wasn’t after April 2017, when they were officially ruled out as a food option), I was told that IHOP no longer made them anymore and that there was no way to recreate them, like the plans had been lost forever.

So, I say IHOP had what was coming to it. Makes sense that if you discard your BEST MENU ITEM, people will stop buying your pancakes enough for you to change your name.

I don’t have a problem with companies like Dunkin’ Donuts changing their name (at least, as far as I know there is impending change) to Dunkin’; I already call it that, and I can probably count on one hand how many donuts I purchased from there in the last 18 months.

But this? This one burns me. You’re a breakfast place, IHOP. Act like it. And if this is your idea of a publicity stunt, it’s stupid and no one likes you. I have always and will continue to refuse to eat your burgers.

IHOB. International House of Bring Back the Cinn-A-Stack Pancakes.

Moving on to politics, because if Donald Trump isn’t featured, is it really considered a month?

Of course, our cartoon president was involved in two major things that happened this past month, both of which I will touch on only very quickly because he does not deserve my attention for any more than I can bare.

The first is his meeting with Kim Jong-Un of North Korea, in the first summit between the leaders of the two countries.

After much hemming and hawing, with both sides threatening to pull out, and Trump even submitting a formal letter to call off the meeting, the two met in Singapore on June 12th.

International opinion was on the positive side, but I really think it’s because the two sides met, talked, and left, without really making complete asshats of themselves.

My favorite part of this was this little nugget from Trump:

“As an example, they have great beaches. You see that whenever they’re exploding their cannons into the ocean. I said, boy, look at that view. Wouldn’t that make a great condo? And I explained, I said, you know, instead of doing that you could have the best hotels in the world right there. Think of it from a real estate perspective. You have South Korea, you have China, and they own the land in the middle. How bad is that, right? It’s great.”

Ah, yes. World peace in the form of real estate development. Joy.

I mean, sure, the guy does have a little bit of a point, but it just amuses me to no end that THIS is what he got out of it.

Meeting with the dictator of a country that the United States has had hostile tensions with ever since the 1950s? You know what would ease international tensions and bring world peace. HOTELS. Bingo. On to the next one.

We are all aware that his entire presidency is all about him, right? It’s just one huge publicity stunt to be relevant again before he withers away and dies in his insanity. We know this, right?

My overall opinion on the guy is that nothing irreparable will be accomplished. I think republicans are just happy to have their title on the presidency, and the human internet troll can have his fun before politics becomes politics again in two and a half years and every executive order he’s introduced gets overturned again.

Think about it. He’s not getting much done at all with a REPUBLICAN CONGRESS. You can’t blame the Democrats for things not getting done if your party controls both the presidency and congress.

Which brings me to my next story.

So, there were children being held in cages at the border, separated from their families after they were detained for crossing the border illegally.

And by separated, I mean there are children being held inside an old Wal-Mart in giant chain link cages, sleeping on floors or mats, totally away from their parents and forced to care for their fellow child.

No one’s political compass is exactly 100% the same as anyone else’s, I don’t believe anyone is the same in that respect. I’ve always been self conscious about sharing my precise political opinions. I’ve always tried to see both sides of an argument and empathize with each (the difference is empathy, not agreement). Perhaps my rhetoric isn’t always correct, and perhaps I’m even a little misguided in my remarks. But here are my two cents.

I think separating families at the border is cruel. I think keeping children locked away together in cages is inhumane. I think the immigration system (and while we’re at it, the prison system) in this country is all kinds of messed up and needs to be fixed.
I feel like there’s deportation of illegal immigrants, and then there’s this humiliation-of-sorts that happens beforehand that just makes me angry.

Being arrested for being in the country illegally, and then held in the United States for being an illegal immigrant? I mean… it feels kind of redundant and I don’t understand why it has to happen.

Obviously one solution is to close the border completely. But I still hold out hope that this country can serve as a melting pot and we can have people from other countries living here trying to make better lives for themselves.

Why not just fucking make it easier? If you’re obsessed with removing people that are here illegally because they’re here illegally, why not make it easier to live here legally? Isn’t that the problem?

We all know “we don’t want them here because they’re here illegally” isn’t really the overt problem. We know it goes much deeper than that. There’s some other heavily-rooted shit in this country that needs addressing. I really don’t feel like getting into it at this juncture, because there’s more to get to, and God knows I’ll probably end up addressing it another time.

Oh, and don’t put children in cages. That’s pretty much the end of my thoughts on that. Stop being cruel and disguising it as patriotism.

*Deep breath.*

The World Cup is happening right now!

First, let’s all laugh at Germany for getting eliminated before the knockout round courtesy of South Korea.

Secondly, look at these Mexico supporters joyfully embracing partying outside the South Korean embassy and even letting them get in on the fun.

Thirdly, I don’t know that I’ve watch a single minute because the United States is not involved. This is perhaps a generalization, but unless you live in Seattle, Portland, or perhaps Columbus, Ohio, I don’t think there are casual soccer fans that exist in America. Like, even when the U.S. is involved in the World Cup, it’s like you can smell the stench of all the fairweather fans hopping up on the “I Believe That We Will Win” bandwagon.

Oh, I 100% am one of those people. But I don’t forget that U.S. soccer embarrassingly lost to Trinidad last year to fail to qualify for the World Cup when there are other sports things happening in this world.

The bandwagon thing is similar to the Olympics, but the United States has traditionally been successful at sports that come along every four years. But not soccer. David Beckham and Zlatan Ibrahimovic and Wayne Rooney are nice and all, but it’s nowhere near enough to pull the casual fan in.

Soccer also has to compete with football, basketball, baseball, and hockey. And people can complain all they want about how the NFL and NBA are “rigged” and how baseball is “too slow” and how they “can’t see the puck” in hockey. But those same people will, nine times out of ten, go back to the “Big Four” tit when faced with the choice of that or a soccer match.

That’s nice that all that money was invested into a program that fell off the face of the earth in November, though.

Let me also touch on the U.S. Open, while we’re here.

Golf is a hard sport. But I don’t think golf should be THIS hard. A final, 72-hole tournament where the winner finishes at ONE OVER PAR? Come on.

Golf is one of those underrated sports. Like NASCAR (yes, stock car racing is a wildly popular and fascinating underrated sport. Fight me). But the way golf is different than NASCAR is that you don’t have to be 16 and have a driver’s license to swing a golf club. Gold has the ability to garner interest from fans who watch or play at a very young age. But I think having the country’s national championship for the sport be so excruciatingly tough to watch (and I can’t even imagine how hard courses like Shinnecock Hill are to play) is going to drive away interest. People WANT to see someone run away with a championship at 20-under par. They want to see someone drive the ball 400 yards or sink a 75-footer. They want to see good golfers actually playing good golf, instead of seeing their idols shoot 11-over on the first nine of the week (looking at you, Rory McIlroy). And maybe the USGA could learn a little from the Masters, by limiting the U.S. Open to a select few courses. Just a thought.

But props to Brooks Koepka, who won his second consecutive U.S. Open. I remember the commentators during the telecast say the Koepka plays overseas a lot in Europe, and how he possesses the mental toughness to get through these tough courses, and that not many other golfers like him have such grit. I respect that.

I only want to talk about one movie, and that is Solo: A Star Wars Story.

There will be potential spoilers. Read at your own risk.

For anyone that knows me, I am a huge Star Wars fan. Solo was the first movie of the franchise that I was actually disappointed with.

Don’t get me wrong, it was a fine movie. Great visual effects, and some of the action sequences were quite fun.

But it wasn’t Rogue One and, after much thought, I question whether this film actually needed to exist. ​

First, the good. I really liked Alden Ehrenreich in the lead role. I felt he accurately captured the aesthetic of Han Solo without coming off too much like an imitation or caricature. Then there were the effects, which were stunning. Solo is one of the most expensive movies ever made, and it showed. They put some effort into the effects.

But where Ehrenreich’s Solo falls short is in the actual action, and that falls with the concept, writing, and directing more than it does with Ehrenreich’s acting.

Han Solo is a scoundrel. He’s a pessimist. His catchphrase is “I’ve got a bad feeling about this.” What I saw in Solo was a dreamer, a lover, a fighter. I think that’s the wrong outlook on the character, but that’s just me, especially with no bridge showing what got him from “I have a really good feeling about this” to “I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

The plot dragged in the middle, and, to be honest, I really didn’t care much about the backstory that was being presented to me.

I cared more about the characters in Rogue One having never met them before than I did about the characters in Solo, two of whom I have known since I was six. I guess that’s what switching creative teams mid-project will do.

Han Solo is already an epic, iconic character. No film needs to convince me that he is already even more epic than he is. They’d be better off making a movie about Obi-Wan Kenobi (which isn’t being made right now, thanks to how this film turned out) and his relationship with Qui-Gon Jinn after Episode III because THAT WAS A HUGE THING FOR ME AND THEY NEVER TOUCHED ON IT NOT ONE TIME AFTER THAT.

Other thoughts on Solo:

• L-3 is a blatant rip-off of K-2SO from Rogue One and wasn’t all that funny.
• Did they make this whole film from the quote “made the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs”? I feel like they did.
• Also, Han was involved in the Imperial Navy? What?? I need to go back and watch A New Hope.
• Unpopular opinion: Donald Glover was just okay. His character arc gave me no reason to believe that Lando and Han are lifelong buddies.
• Oh and THIS NUGGET. (SPOILERSPOILERSPOILERSPOILER)

I guess I should be watching Rebels. The filmmakers knew they screwed up by killing off Darth Maul, so they’re trying to make this half-assed second attempt to make him relevant again. Which is fine but also not at all fine.


So we've had enough pessimism for one day, I think. Let's do a positive story, just to finish this thing out on a high note.
​

This raccoon in Minnesota scaled a building. Not just any building, the 15th-tallest building in St. Paul, Minnesota. And I don’t mean like there was a big ladder or a cable or anything.

I mean he straight up Mission-Impossible’d this thing.

The videos and images of this adorable creature lit up Twitter, and captivated the nation as the tweets went out.

Raccoons have incredible climbing skills (according to Google), but climbing 23-story tall buildings is obviously way out of the ordinary for these backyard trash-searchers.
​
The New York Times chronicled the climb in story fashion and I encourage you to check it out.

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And, that was your monthly report for June, 2018.

I don’t know if there are any July puns like there are for May and June, and I really don’t feel like looking. But thank you, readers, for indulging me in this new project. Leave a comment below if you like it, and let me know if there’s anything you’d rather I touch on for next time!

What that makes the Tony Awards different from any other awards show are the performances. For a medium that is unlike any other, in that people can only see shows in one place at one time for an absurd amount of money, the Tonys offer us normal people a glimpse of what beautiful spectacle and artwork awaits us in New York.

Since the Tony Awards are this evening, I thought I’d throw a quick list together of the greatest Tony television performances.

There are a bunch that didn’t make this list, I understand that right out of the gate. Betty Buckley’s stirring rendition of “Memory” from Cats isn’t here. Neither is “Turkey Lurkey Time” from Promises, Promises, and neither is “I Am What I Am” from La Cage Aux Folles. I 110% acknowledge that these songs and performances are great in their own rights.

Other personal preferences include "Run Freedom Run" from Urinetown, "Gold" from Once, "I Believe" from The Book of Mormon, "Anything Goes" from the 2011 revival of Anything Goes. All incredible. And if I had more room (and more time), the list would be longer and they'd all be here too.

But every other song on this list is here for a reason… and of course, I certainly like some shows over others.

So, on we go.

Les Misèrables, "At The End of the Day"/"One Day More" (1987)

This was the performance the showed that the British invasion was here and was very, very real. I may not be Les Mis’s biggest fan, but these are two of my favorite songs. There’s something oddly satisfying about the simple two-step marching and red flag waving in the background. Not to mention all those swirling motifs building over the course of “One Day More.”

​
Fun Home, "Ring of Keys" (2015)

Note how Sydney Lucas plays to the camera on this one. As great as the performances of  Something Rotten and The King and I were, Fun Home stole the show with this quiet, intimate, soul-searching song for a proto-lesbian girl after trying to make sense of what a fateful encounter with another woman might mean. Truly stirring.


In the Heights, "In the Heights"/"96,000" (2008)

Before Lin-Manuel Miranda created Hamilton, he created In the Heights. Having lived in Washington Heights, In the Heights is, to a T, the world that Miranda described. This jubilant medley that creates the high-energy world of upper Manhattan, and then flies into a song dealing with the prospects of winning the lottery, was one of the best performances of the night. This fresh take on what music belongs on a Broadway stage earned the show the Tony for Best Musical.


​Company, "Being Alive" (2007)

I really love Raul Esparza’s Bobby. It’s classy and refined, yet rough and deeply flawed all at the same time. Watching the full version of the 2007 revival of Company and this performance are two different things, but the fact that it is stripped down to a man and his piano allows us to see, bare bones, the personal breakthrough that Esparza’s Bobby is on the verge of, in all its glorious intensity.

​
Spring Awakening, "Mama Who Bore Me"/"The Bitch of Living"/"Totally Fucked" (2007)

The Deaf West performance was moving, but there’s nothing like the original, especially when Spring Awakening had first appeared on Broadway. Is that… is that a rock musical whose songs actually sound like rock songs? And yeah, maybe covering up of mouths during swear words is a little corny… but that chorus of “blah blah blah”s during “Totally Fucked” is chilling and inspiring.


Next to Normal, "You Don't Know"/"I Am the One" (2009)

I love me some Next to Normal. And I actually… don’t hate Alice Ripley in this. She’s like steel wool- rough, but powers through and gets the job done. I love everything about this performance, from the song choice, to the direction, to Ripley’s every choice as the frazzled Diana, dealing with her husband’s frustration and her son’s haunting temptation. Also, baby Aaron Tveit for the win.

10. Hamilton, "History Has Its Eyes On You"/"Yorktown" (2016)

Taking place on the night after the Pulse nightclub shooting in Orlando, the LGBT and greater theatre community was in a vulnerable state. Hamilton, the favorite for just about every award that year, brought the house down and helped heal hearts a little bit with a performance for the ages. The caveat- their song choice, involving the Battle of Yorktown, featured soldiers carrying muskets. In a powerful statement, the cast chose to do the number without the use of guns. When everyone freezes after the intense dance break to see people holding invisible guns- it’s a really powerful and moving image. On top of that, Hamilton is representative of a reset of how the world sees musical theatre, as Miranda's war story pushed Broadway once more to the forefront of cultural relevance.


​9. Guys and Dolls, "Sit Down, You're Rocking the Boat" (2009)

Ah, the power of live theatre. When Tituss Burgess’ microphone died on him, the run crew stepped up and frantically delivered a handheld mic mid-song (hooray for shotty audio feeds allowing us to hear when the crew member was “going in with it”). No hat, no problem. I love the arrangement of this showstopper, as the coda has this really cool new gospel-type groove, which I much prefer to the shorter, less-climactic original version. Also, Tituss casually knocking a high E out of the park on the last line. Look, ma! One hand!


​8. Gypsy, "Everything's Coming Up Roses" (2008)

Angela is the OG. Bernadette was fantastic. But, as I begrudgingly admit, there’s something romantic about Patti LuPone playing Mama Rose. I think this is the last great Patti performance we’ll get, but man, is this Act I closer of Gypsy powerful. Patti has this extraordinary ability to fill both the television screen as well as Radio City Music Hall, as Rose’s bottomless frustration grows in intensity, as she refuses to let reality get in her way.


7. Hairspray, "You Can't Stop the Beat" (2003)

This is the best closing number in the history of musical theatre. Fight me. And even though the song is very formulaic- with something like five different character groups getting a verse and chorus to themselves- it is futile to bop along with the music. High points include Harvey Fierstein’s entrance, Matthew Morrison’s white suit, and everything from 3:41 onwards. Enjoy.

​
6. Evita, "A New Argentina" (1980)

My opinion is that everything that Andrew Lloyd Webber wrote 1980 and before it is amazing, and everything after it is garbage. Evita fits into that category as the last piece, premiering in 1979. It is amazing how a composer make a chanting crowd sound terrifying. But the story here is the “A New Argentina,” the Act I finale, in which we get to see peak Mandy and Patti as Che and Eva- and where Patti becomes the first mainstream talent to create the concept of the belting diva in a rock musical. Also, there’s fire! Hooray fire! (Spoiler, the vocals were pre-taped for the telecast, but it’s still fierce as hell.)


​5. A Chorus Line, "I Hope I Get It" (1976)

A Chorus Line was widely expected to win the Tony for Best Musical in 1976, so much so that the producers for the Tonys actually allowed the show to perform twice on the telecast- first and last. The first is the opening number to the show, and while it does clock in at just over seven minutes in length, it’s shot brilliantly, effectively capturing the essence of the stressful audition world. This timeless number being placed at the start of the Tony Awards is metaphorical for the life cycle of a performer, in a way; starting out at the audition and putting oneself out there for judgment, only to find themselves taking home the big prize at the end of the night.


​4. The Will Rogers Follies, "Will-a-Mania"/"Our Favorite Son" (1991)

It is time for me to bite the bullet and confess something about The Will Rogers Follies. That confession is that the show, and in particular, these two numbers, are BRILLIANT. Because of the nature of the show being essentially a Ziegfeld-revue, the show’s creators could really go all-out with the showmanship. That’s exactly what they did. Placed between a group of chorus girls decked out in stars and stripes, Keith Carradine leads the row in a masterclass of precision dancing and syncopated movement reminiscent of a Rockettes show, while SEATED. I am floored and I am glad to know this music.

​
3. Grand Hotel, "We'll Take a Glass Together" (1990)

There aren’t many greater joys than drunken romps. Maury Yeston’s Grand Hotel, a lesser-known show among casual theatergoers, features this exuberant number where a terminally-ill accountant poised on having a good time, is egged on by a shady baron into indulging in some drinks and other revelry.

My question is: does Michael Jeter have bones? Watch as he seems to turn into human liquid, bending, twisting, and flailing about in a ridiculous show of control.

Not surprisingly, Jeter won a Tony for Best Featured Actor in a musical.


2. The Lion King, "Circle of Life" (1998)

Admit it, you got chills when that blare from Tsidii Le Loko hit at the beginning of “Circle of Life.” While a Disney show, Julie Taymor’s reimagining showed us that this was not your children’s version of the Lion King. A dazzling menagerie of brilliantly-created puppetry transformed Radio City into the plains of the Serengeti, complete with antelopes, birds, jungle cats, giraffes, an elephant and a rhino. There’s nothing like this Tony performance, and it’s a testament as to why Lion King has been able to survive for so long.

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1. Dreamgirls, "It's All Over"/"And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going" (1982)

There is nothing but awe for this one. Just watch it. It’s the best. There is no competition. Jennifer Holliday is a queen.



What are your favorite Tony performances? Leave a comment down below. 

The 72nd Tony Awards are tonight, Sunday, June 10th on CBS.

​I guess the American Theatre Wing really loved Carousel this year. I didn’t care for it. And yet, here sits the Rodgers and Hammerstein “classic,” with 11 nominations in the bag, the most for any musical revival this year.

​

• The Band’s Visit
• Frozen
• Mean Girls
• Spongebob Squarepants

​Considering there was never much competition aside from Escape To Margaritaville, which is scheduled to close in three weeks, this is your solidly user-friendly group of Best Musical nominees. Mean Girls and Frozen continue to be the fan favorites, but Spongebob Squarepants, and especially The Band’s Visit have ruled the news columns. Band’s Visit was the first musical of the four to open, meaning it has the tendency to lose steam among voters. But I think we get another case of the Dear Evan Hansens this year, and The Band’s Visit makes a wire-to-wire trip to the top.

Will win: The Band’s Visit
Should win: Spongebob Squarepants
Could win: Mean Girls

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• Rodgers and Hammerstein's Carousel
• My Fair Lady
• Once On This Island

If Once On This Island doesn’t win, I’m gonna be rip shit on someone, because this “little-revival-that-could” DESERVES. TO. WIN. Given, no, I haven’t seen My Fair Lady yet. But I’m tired of all these Bart Sher- directed Lincoln Center productions winning Best Revival prizes. Give it to another show, for goodness sake.

Will and should win: Once On This Island
Could win: ​My Fair Lady
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